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I know that the only strict requirement right now is the 1 hour before Mass rule.  My husband likes to fast from Midnight the night before, and the Mass we tend to attend is at 11am.  We feed our daughter a bowl of Cheerios before Mass because she is only 5 and usually by the time we get to the church she wants to eat AGAIN....

Mass is usually over at around 1pm, so by that time my husband hasn't had anything to eat and he's just ravenous.  his mood gets worse and worse ad the morning goes on.  We'll sometimes go out to eat with friends from Church, or we'll drive home and he'll complain that lunch isn't ready soon enough.  He's always snapping at me but Sundays it's worse than usual.  Half the time, we'll get into arguments in the car because he's aggravated by something I did, or by our daughter.  It really bothers me because we've just received the Body and Blood of Our Lord and here we are, having an argument in the car---which is so harmful for children to grow up with.  I don't want my children to grow up dreading Sundays because their father is such a grumpypuss and everyone is really touchy.

Should I suggest we start eating breakfast in the morning?  Should I just offer it up and hope that our kids aren't messed up and associate church with their father's irritability?  How should I approach him about this delicately? 
Tenderly and diplomatic tell your husband that it is improper for Christians to undertake mortifications that mortify other people, i.e. yourself. If your husband is irksome beyond your endurance, then there is no virtue in his fasting, which is well beyond the expected norm.

In the past, when Catholics were expected to fast from midnight, they usually attended Sunday Mass very early on in the morning. Remember, the afternoon and evening Mass are relatively new. In olden times people would have gone to mass at 6am, 7am, 8am.

Your husband is most probably misinformed. The previous rule was not 'from midnight', this is a very old practice indeed, and although venerable, it was replaced by three hours a long time ago. Three hours was the norm before the council. Three hours. I recommend your husband have breakfast early in the morning. This way he can observe a more stricter fast than one hour, and not be a little monster on the way home.

In practice, before the three hour rule was introduced, many people simply just did not receive Holy Communion. This was bad. The reason why the Church relaxed the rule was a mercy, for our benefit, to encourage frequent Communions. Although the one hour practice seems a bit lax.

I know the Eastern Church is proud of her ancient midnight rule. But is this necessarily the most conducive practice for the sanctification of souls? Perhaps not, which is why it has been made voluntary.
It's like Lent, if your self-sacrifice is making you act less as a Christian....you're doing it wrong!

Take Miles advice and calmly tell your husband that perhaps he should either go to Mass very early, or reduce his fasting.
I once read about St Gemma Galgani who suffered debilitating illness and bore it with cheerfulness.... She never showed her pain and smiled through it.

So I thought for Lent, I'd give up taking pain medication.  I told my wife and my homecare nurses not to give it to me.  I prayed for extra gracesAnd tried to cope with the pain as best I could

But it was a struggle not to be short with my care givers.  My son would come in ask if I could read to him... And I pushed him away.  I wasn't showing gratitude.  The pain made it harder to move around and I needed more help with basic things... And I want showing gratitude for that help.

At one point my wife came in with a syringe and the vial of the medication and said, "I can't deal with this for the rest of Lent and I don't think you can, either."

It was a relief... I didn't want to go back on my Lenten promise but the penance I was trying to do was not the right thing for me or my family. 

I think in the desire tomake heroic sacrifices it's easy to forget our state in life.  There are saints that dated for months on end and ate nothing but holy Communion... Doesn't mean we all ought to go on the Padre Pio diet
Indeed fasting and penance are both high standards that we look up to in order to grow in humility and means to greater holiness, not ends in themselves. Wow Chestertonian, giving up pain meds had to be rough, especially if you are on prescription narcotics for some reason! Detox off opiates, willing or not, is a foretaste of purgatory if there ever was one.
I like to fast from midnight too, but allow my wife and children to do the vatican 2 fast (which my liberal friends like to remind me that it's an hour before receiving Holy Communion, not an hour before Mass -- let's see -- if you go to a solemn high TLM you could basically eat from the introit until the sermon and still be ok under V2 rules -- I do not encourage this, I'm just trying to point out the absurdity here).

Once in a while I have to do the one hour fast for one reason or another.  Remember Our Lord said "The sabbath was made for man, and not man for the sabbath (cf. St. Mark 2:23-27)."


(05-18-2014, 07:58 PM)formerbuddhist Wrote: [ -> ]Indeed fasting and penance are both high standards that we look up to in order to grow in humility and means to greater holiness, not ends in themselves. Wow Chestertonian, giving up pain meds had to be rough, especially if you are on prescription narcotics for some reason! Detox off opiates, willing or not, is a foretaste of purgatory if there ever was one.

Detox from opiates is about 48 hours of really bad sickness  -- withdrawal from alcohol can be much worse.
(05-18-2014, 03:16 PM)JubilateDeo83 Wrote: [ -> ]I know that the only strict requirement right now is the 1 hour before Mass rule.  My husband likes to fast from Midnight the night before, and the Mass we tend to attend is at 11am.  We feed our daughter a bowl of Cheerios before Mass because she is only 5 and usually by the time we get to the church she wants to eat AGAIN....

Mass is usually over at around 1pm, so by that time my husband hasn't had anything to eat and he's just ravenous.  his mood gets worse and worse ad the morning goes on.  We'll sometimes go out to eat with friends from Church, or we'll drive home and he'll complain that lunch isn't ready soon enough.  He's always snapping at me but Sundays it's worse than usual.  Half the time, we'll get into arguments in the car because he's aggravated by something I did, or by our daughter.  It really bothers me because we've just received the Body and Blood of Our Lord and here we are, having an argument in the car---which is so harmful for children to grow up with.  I don't want my children to grow up dreading Sundays because their father is such a grumpypuss and everyone is really touchy.

Should I suggest we start eating breakfast in the morning?  Should I just offer it up and hope that our kids aren't messed up and associate church with their father's irritability?  How should I approach him about this delicately? 


Unless he has some kind of condition that requires him to eat more frequently I'd tell him to man up and stop complaining. Seriously.........going without food for part of one day.......grow up and stop whining.
(05-20-2014, 08:52 PM)Gidge Wrote: [ -> ]I like to fast from midnight too, but allow my wife and children to do the vatican 2 fast (which my liberal friends like to remind me that it's an hour before receiving Holy Communion, not an hour before Mass -- let's see -- if you go to a solemn high TLM you could basically eat from the introit until the sermon and still be ok under V2 rules -- I do not encourage this, I'm just trying to point out the absurdity here).

Once in a while I have to do the one hour fast for one reason or another.  Remember Our Lord said "The sabbath was made for man, and not man for the sabbath (cf. St. Mark 2:23-27)."


(05-18-2014, 07:58 PM)formerbuddhist Wrote: [ -> ]Indeed fasting and penance are both high standards that we look up to in order to grow in humility and means to greater holiness, not ends in themselves. Wow Chestertonian, giving up pain meds had to be rough, especially if you are on prescription narcotics for some reason! Detox off opiates, willing or not, is a foretaste of purgatory if there ever was one.

Detox from opiates is about 48 hours of really bad sickness  -- withdrawal from alcohol can be much worse.

believe me gidge,I know, I've struggled on and off with opiate addiction for years. The worst part is the crippling fatigue,insomnia and psychological cravings after the 48 hours of flu like nastiness. You're right though,alcohol can be more dangerous and unlike opiate withdrawal, life threatening.
(05-18-2014, 03:41 PM)Miles Immaculatae Wrote: [ -> ]In the past, when Catholics were expected to fast from midnight, they usually attended Sunday Mass very early on in the morning. Remember, the afternoon and evening Mass are relatively new. In olden times people would have gone to mass at 6am, 7am, 8am.

I usually manage to fast from midnight when I attended Mass early in the morning. If I attend the 09:30 or the 11:00 one, I tend to fast less (though always more than the 1 hour minimum). The same applies when I have to attend Mass on Saturday evening.
(05-20-2014, 09:07 PM)Silouan Wrote: [ -> ]
(05-18-2014, 03:16 PM)JubilateDeo83 Wrote: [ -> ]I know that the only strict requirement right now is the 1 hour before Mass rule.  My husband likes to fast from Midnight the night before, and the Mass we tend to attend is at 11am.  We feed our daughter a bowl of Cheerios before Mass because she is only 5 and usually by the time we get to the church she wants to eat AGAIN....

Mass is usually over at around 1pm, so by that time my husband hasn't had anything to eat and he's just ravenous.  his mood gets worse and worse ad the morning goes on.  We'll sometimes go out to eat with friends from Church, or we'll drive home and he'll complain that lunch isn't ready soon enough.  He's always snapping at me but Sundays it's worse than usual.  Half the time, we'll get into arguments in the car because he's aggravated by something I did, or by our daughter.  It really bothers me because we've just received the Body and Blood of Our Lord and here we are, having an argument in the car---which is so harmful for children to grow up with.  I don't want my children to grow up dreading Sundays because their father is such a grumpypuss and everyone is really touchy.

Should I suggest we start eating breakfast in the morning?  Should I just offer it up and hope that our kids aren't messed up and associate church with their father's irritability?  How should I approach him about this delicately? 


Unless he has some kind of condition that requires him to eat more frequently I'd tell him to man up and stop complaining. Seriously.........going without food for part of one day.......grow up and stop whining.

Blood sugar levels affect mood.
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