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This is actually something that my wife has noticed.  She grew up in the SSPX, and since she's married me, we've been a part of a young professional group at the novus ordo church that I used to/still occasionally go to.  Based on her experience, and in comparison, the novus ordo Catholics are more charitable, gregarious, and welcoming/accepting than the traditional parishes that she's used to.  I have to say that this has also been my experience, as well.  It's not that traddies aren't nice, but there is perhaps that chip on the shoulder, and they tend to be more defensive, judgmental, rigid, and cliquish at times.  Of course this is just a generalization, but one that we both have noticed, nonetheless.

I would go so far as to say that perhaps this is one good thing about novus ordo Catholics that traditional Catholics could learn from, obviously not at the expense of the tradition that's so near and dear to their hearts, but just in general.  So I guess what I'm trying to say is: Lighten up a bit!

Do you agree or disagree?
I've seen the good and bad of both sides.

I know many traditionalists (even SSPX supporters) who are some of the most outgoing, selfless Catholics there are, and wonderfully welcoming. I find generally these are the folks with the best balanced spiritual lives and often the most involved. I also know too many traditionalists who are so obsessed with "the crisis" and "the evil world" that they are insular, cold and are the first to lambaste the poor newbie at the church with their most recent pet theory about our reptilian overlords.

I know many mainstream Catholics (Novus Ordo attendees) who are very good Catholics. I also know more than a few who despite being "conservative" will refuse contact with you if you are associated in any way with the SSPX. I've had great conversations with fellow Catholics ended coldly and suddenly when they found out my connection with the SSPX.

I think it goes both ways. In general, if there are problems, the Novus Ordo types tend to be overly accepting of what is not Catholic while not accepting of tradition and traditionalists; the traditionalists tend to be too focused on the minutia of the crisis and insular, looking at anything non-traditional as suspect.

There are good and holy people on both sides and there are pains on both sides, too, though it is understandable with tradition being a bit more "on the fringe" we tend to get some more interesting folks.
(04-03-2016, 05:33 PM)AllSeasons Wrote: [ -> ]This is actually something that my wife has noticed.  She grew up in the SSPX, and since she's married me, we've been a part of a young professional group at the novus ordo church that I used to/still occasionally go to.  Based on her experience, and in comparison, the novus ordo Catholics are more charitable, gregarious, and welcoming/accepting than the traditional parishes that she's used to.  I have to say that this has also been my experience, as well.  It's not that traddies aren't nice, but there is perhaps that chip on the shoulder, and they tend to be more defensive, judgmental, rigid, and cliquish at times.  Of course this is just a generalization, but one that we both have noticed, nonetheless.

I would go so far as to say that perhaps this is one good thing about novus ordo Catholics that traditional Catholics could learn from, obviously not at the expense of the tradition that's so near and dear to their hearts, but just in general.  So I guess what I'm trying to say is: Lighten up a bit!

Do you agree or disagree?

Interesting.  There may be a correlation to the fact that N.O. Catholics  may have more means to be charitable than your typical SSPX type families (inconclusive, just an opinion).  I attend an SSPX mass weekly; the families are generally larger, and as the youngest from a family of 10 myself, I can say life was a challenge.  Add to this the fact that the SSPX type has generally not done well off of the world... They don't generally embrace the trappings that come with the world, nor do they invest heavily into getting more out of the world.  One other point that I mentioned to my wife today, and perhaps MM touched on this; I see a lot of people who look like they have "checked out of the program" in Mass.  Perhaps this is not the case, but living off of the grid and out of the mainstream in all facets of life cannot be all that prosperous. 

On the other side of the coin, it is commendable that so many people of all ages attending the NO who have done well or are doing well are giving back to the church and community.    However, there is an older man who has a lot of kids whose wife has died in my community.  He goes to the NO mass with his handicapped daughter in her 50's regularly.  Although he lives a modest life  and doesn't look like a man of means, It has been rumored that he is one of the parishes biggest weekly contributors,  yet everything about him is so understated.  So you never know who is giving what.... Some people are just very low key with what they do give in both realms, both in heart and in wealth.
I think it depends a lot on what you are talking about. I attend both, and there are many differences, but I would avoid jumping to conclusions too quickly, because once you change up the questions, the answers become surprising. For instance, in my trad parish, some people make absurd comments to woman wearing pants, or who do not wear veils, and by absurd, I mean very uncharitable. This would never happen in an NO parish. Fine. However, I also know that the priest and parishioners of my NO parish, who see me every day in adoration and in weekday masses, who are all smiles when we are not dealing with anything serious, as SOON as you say that you attend TLM on Sunday, they will jump, even physically, as if shocked or bitten, and exclaim, faces contorted, "Latin Mass?? LATIN Mass??!? Ugh, no, that is not right, that is not the community, I don't agree with that . . . ."

So, it depends on the topic. People in my trad mass have no such reactions when I tell them I go to NO during the week.  But it depends. There are people in my trad mass who say awful things about Pope Francis. I know I am guilty also of making critical comments about him. Nobody in my NO parish would say any such thing. But some of them have said terrible things about my wanting to have my child evaluated by a priest that he knows well in order to determine if the boy could begin to receive communion. Then I heard a lot of uncharitable things about other Catholic groups.

In my diocese, our bishop used to have us for a certain time recite a prayer for vocations after Mass in NO churches. No vocations emerged from NO parishes. But about 3 men felt called to live as traditional benedictine monks. Bishop shut them down. I have heard second-hand quotes of what the bishop said, and it was very uncharitable.

So, I think we all have failings, but in different areas as far as this topic is concerned. I will say, though, that, as one who attends both, trads are at the receiving end of the absolutely nastiest uncharitable attitudes I have ever seen. And I am not a trad, as most here would know. I am just learning. So I guess I disagree. NO Catholics are much more like Prots, in that they place a lot of importance on the appearance of charitableness. This is a North American thing, I think. When you go to a place like Spain, coming from the Americas, you can be a bit shocked, as people don't "seem" so cheery-charitable. This is a cultural thing.
Wait a minute. Are we talking about charitable as in "nice" or charitable as in giving to charity?
(04-03-2016, 10:37 PM)PrairieMom Wrote: [ -> ]Wait a minute. Are we talking about charitable as in "nice" or charitable as in giving to charity?

I took it as both, but leaned towards th giving side.... But I get things wrong more often than not.... ???
I would say that NO people tend to be more "friendly" in church than trads, mainly because they have adopted more of a protestant congregationalist view which does have its time and place whereas trads tend to work at it from the opposite angle. Friendliness does not equate charitableness. True charity can show in almost anyone with the proper disposition, we all have our faults. Many NO people are very devout and are just as convicted with their beliefs as Trads. I would say that although the traditional route is more efficient in producing charity in persons, current circumstances make it easier for some to just find a reverent NO.

I have a deep love for traditional Catholicism in all its forms but I also currently go to a relatively reverent NO. While I would much rather the NO never existed I find that it actually helps me in a way to avoid a certain sort of pride to which I would inevitably be drawn had I access to a trad parish. Its hard to explain, the NO has helped me move away from liturgical "trappings" and to focus on the Eucharist. One day I hope to eventually be able to attend a trad church as I believe it to be far better than the NO but in the meantime I focus my attention not on the presentation of the Mass but on the heart of the Mass itself which remains unchanged between the two.

Sorry if this doesn't make sense, its almost 2:00 am and I am exhausted.
(04-03-2016, 05:33 PM)AllSeasons Wrote: [ -> ]This is actually something that my wife has noticed.  She grew up in the SSPX, and since she's married me, we've been a part of a young professional group at the novus ordo church that I used to/still occasionally go to.  Based on her experience, and in comparison, the novus ordo Catholics are more charitable, gregarious, and welcoming/accepting than the traditional parishes that she's used to.  I have to say that this has also been my experience, as well.  It's not that traddies aren't nice, but there is perhaps that chip on the shoulder, and they tend to be more defensive, judgmental, rigid, and cliquish at times.  Of course this is just a generalization, but one that we both have noticed, nonetheless.

I would go so far as to say that perhaps this is one good thing about novus ordo Catholics that traditional Catholics could learn from, obviously not at the expense of the tradition that's so near and dear to their hearts, but just in general.  So I guess what I'm trying to say is: Lighten up a bit!

Do you agree or disagree?

I agree
I don't know as far as charitable giving is concerned, but my wife and I have both noticed that overall, trad and conservative NO Catholics with larger families tend to be a bit more standoff-ish at first.  Not rude or unpleasant, just a bit guarded about who they're going to alone within the families "trust circle," for lack of a better term.
(04-03-2016, 10:43 PM)The Tax Collector Wrote: [ -> ]
(04-03-2016, 10:37 PM)PrairieMom Wrote: [ -> ]Wait a minute. Are we talking about charitable as in "nice" or charitable as in giving to charity?

I took it as both, but leaned towards th giving side.... But I get things wrong more often than not.... ???

Sorry for the confusion.  I meant being charitable as in being "nice" to others, not almsgiving.
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