Single Guys: The Bible of Dating!
#31
ErinIsNotNice Wrote:I know some wonderful single Catholic young women, just what a traddie guy would want: sweet, devout, wanting nothing more than to have a huge herd of kids and homeschool them---  BUT, they are unattractive. So if the Catholic guys are stupid and pass them by for someone selfish but pretty, they deserve all the suffering they get.

Haha. AMEN, sister! ^5! I don't even need to comment with others contributing gems like this.
 
- Lisa

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#32
ErinIsNotNice Wrote:
StevusMagnus Wrote:
CanadianCatholic Wrote:If a guy marries a woman dumb enough to spend mad amounts of money on frivolities, when the family is broke and suffering...well hes the idiot, not her

This is where the dating advice comes in. If you follow Hodges advice you weed out the princesses and you don't get into this situation.

However, in our modern world, there are many selfish "Catholic" women such as these and if a Catholic man has married one he must set boundaries for the sake of the family.

Guys don't need a "system" to avoid bad women-- they need to stop going for looks over what's really important.  They know full well when they are dating what you call "princesses" but they don't care.

I know some wonderful single Catholic young women, just what a traddie guy would want: sweet, devout, wanting nothing more than to have a huge herd of kids and homeschool them---  BUT, they are unattractive.
So if the Catholic guys are stupid and pass them by for someone selfish but pretty, they deserve all the suffering they get.
Hey Mrs notnice, women can be just as freakin shallow and there are a lot of good single Catholic guys on the other end of your little equation.(I'm not one of them, thank God)

But then again, I will agree with you on the "good looks" part, because usually women will settle for a ugly old dude if he's got one thing; money.

Don't have to look far for that example, look how many beautiful young babes in hollywierd are shacked up with them ugly , old has-beens or even them Wall Street types with them young trophy wives.

Let's not be hypocritical here.


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#33
alaric Wrote:But then again, I will agree with you on the "good looks" part, because usually women will settle for a ugly old dude if he's got one thing; money.

Don't have to look far for that example, look how many beautiful young babes in hollywierd are shacked up with them ugly , old has-beens or even them Wall Street types with them young trophy wives.

Let's not be hypocritical here.

I am speaking solely of practicing Catholics who should know better.
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#34
Yeah, and after 50 years of marriage, most couples end up looking like each other anyway. [Image: laff.gif] - Lisa
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#35
ErinIsNotNice Wrote:Guys don't need a "system" to avoid bad women-- they need to stop going for looks over what's really important.  They know full well when they are dating what you call "princesses" but they don't care.

I know some wonderful single Catholic young women, just what a traddie guy would want: sweet, devout, wanting nothing more than to have a huge herd of kids and homeschool them---  BUT, they are unattractive.
So if the Catholic guys are stupid and pass them by for someone selfish but pretty, they deserve all the suffering they get.
Amen to that!  I know several women who are not classically attractive, and would make excellent wives but never ever even get a date.  And these women aren't ugly either, just not comparable to the kind of beauty that gets shoved in everyone's face at every turn in our society.

I'm not classically attractive either, not by a long shot.  I'm lucky that I've found a man whose principals are in the right place.

The other side of it is that a man has to be worth pursuing in marriage.  He has to develop his career, and show that he is willing to support a family.  I may be wrong, but I tend to get the impression that there's quite a few young trad men out there who do not sufficiently tend to developing themselves.  Young men who would be good candidates for marriage and fatherhood should be spending their spare time on their studies, improving their career, or working long hours while they're young and unmarried to build a nest egg.  What they shouldn't be doing is wasting all their time bemoaning the woes of society and dating, and complaining about all the temptation out there making them want to masturbate.  Get off the computer for awhile!
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#36
I think the bottom line is this:

a) To find a good wife or husband we should try and overcome a focus on looks, there are MANY diamonds in the rough out there. I will add that I have seen WAY more women with less attractive partners then men, so guys should focus on this especially.

b) I think men should be strong enough to lead and order a family, but they should pick wives who don't need to be corralled. If a man falls in love with a women who is not very good at controlling spending or fulfilling her duties efficiently, they should work together to fix the issue. Men have tendencies towards over spending and self-indulgence as well. This picture we get of women in a beauty salon, getting a manicure while shopping bags are piled up all around her is a little sexist. LOL

 I also think Steveus, that things like no TV, homeschooling, and the like are choices that couples should make together, but for goodness sakes marry someone who shares these feelings with you...otherwise there will be a lot of other problems to come.

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#37
StrictCatholicGirl Wrote:Yeah, and after 50 years of marriage, most couples end up looking like each other anyway. [Image: laff.gif] - Lisa
Damn if that ain't the truth Lisa, like everything else in nature.

 That's why when you hear the ol "We just grew apart and became different people after so many years" bs psycho-babble they throw out there for reasons people separate and divorce. Most married couples (like my parents) after being together for years and years actually grow closer together.  the longer your together the bond grows stronger, many similarities, even looks, as weird as that is. But the point is the two become one, as God intended it to be, not "we just grew apart after so many years" drivel from the anti-family establishment out there.
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#38
StrictCatholicGirl Wrote:
ErinIsNotNice Wrote:I know some wonderful single Catholic young women, just what a traddie guy would want: sweet, devout, wanting nothing more than to have a huge herd of kids and homeschool them---  BUT, they are unattractive. So if the Catholic guys are stupid and pass them by for someone selfish but pretty, they deserve all the suffering they get.

Haha. AMEN, sister! ^5! I don't even need to comment with others contributing gems like this.
 
- Lisa

Brilliant, Erin!
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#39
I think a previous poster had a good point - these are choices to be made together. 
Recently, a friend of mine who has returned to her faith started dating a Catholic gentleman.  She was instantly smitten, they became exclusive, (without any of Stevus' weird games of him being elusive or whatever, I might add) and then this Catholic man started TELLING her what his wife would do/not do.  My wife will homeschool our children.  My wife will wear dresses.  My wife will bake pies.  Whatever.  My poor friend became so overwhelmed by all of his "My wife will" rules, and eventually ended the relationship.  This guy wasn't willing to discuss anything and be a partner.  She felt (sadly) unworthy of his make believe wife.

Where does it end?  Does a husband have the last word on wardrobe?  On who his wife is allowed to vote for?  What said wife will make for dinner?  Is it up to the husband if his wife delivers their children at home, in a hospital, with meds/without meds?

And before anyone jumps on me about being some crazed feminist, let me just say up front: I'm a lucky to be stay-at-home mom who cooks her family dinner every night, packs his lunch each morning, and will probably homeschool my children.

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#40
reginacaelorum Wrote:I think a previous poster had a good point - these are choices to be made together. 
Recently, a friend of mine who has returned to her faith started dating a Catholic gentleman.  She was instantly smitten, they became exclusive, (without any of Stevus' weird games of him being elusive or whatever, I might add) and then this Catholic man started TELLING her what his wife would do/not do.  My wife will homeschool our children.  My wife will wear dresses.  My wife will bake pies.  Whatever.  My poor friend became so overwhelmed by all of his "My wife will" rules, and eventually ended the relationship.  This guy wasn't willing to discuss anything and be a partner.  She felt (sadly) unworthy of his make believe wife.

Where does it end?  Does a husband have the last word on wardrobe?  On who his wife is allowed to vote for?  What said wife will make for dinner?  Is it up to the husband if his wife delivers their children at home, in a hospital, with meds/without meds?

And before anyone jumps on me about being some crazed feminist, let me just say up front: I'm a lucky to be stay-at-home mom who cooks her family dinner every night, packs his lunch each morning, and will probably homeschool my children.
  The rules are fairly simple and uncomplicated;
 From the book of Ephesians 5;22-33
Wives and Husbands  22Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
 25Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26to make her holy, cleansing[b] her by the washing with water through the word, 27and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— 30for we are members of his body. 31"For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh."[c] 32This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
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