I seem to be fascinated with Satanism
#11
Your probably oppressed, but I highly doubt you are possessed... Possessions are very rare, and if you go to Church and receive the Sacraments devoutly, especially at a TLM then I don't think you can be possessed... Just STOP obsessing over the occult... I use to read about such stuff to learn more and understand the horrible reality of it, but I don't think about it all the time... Also get some Holy Water from a Traditional priest and keep it in your room!
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#12

nobody seems to have mentioned the power of the crucifix and holy water against demons.  we don't know if demons are actually targeting you but the crucifix and holy water should work against your temptation to read about satanism, too.  i don't think you're possessed since you're looking for a way out of your obsession with satanism.  but i'm not an exorcist nor do i play one on FE.  don't push your luck in dealing with the dark side.  start reading about saints.

if you're not wearing a crucifix on a chain around your neck, start doing so ASAP.

if you don't have a crucifix hanging on the wall over the head of your bed, put one up ASAP.  if you can't hang one there for some reason, hang it on a wall close to your bed or even over the doorway (on the inside) of your room.

take a clean empty bottle to your church ASAP and fill it with holy water.  ask where the holy water is -- you're not supposed to take it out of the fonts in church; there should be a very large urn with a spigot for parishioners to get holy water from.  the easiest thing to do would be to use a water bottle that previously had bottled water in it.  mark a cross on the top so you'll remember it's holy water and not drink it all when you get thirsty.

sprinkle some holy water around your bedroom, letting a few drops fall on your bed, while praying for protection from evil.

bless yourself often with holy water.  if you don't have a font, keep some in a scallop- type shell or a saucer to make this easier.

see a priest ASAP.  if, like me and many others, you don't have access to a traditional Latin Mass or Extraordinary Form, as Pope Benedict has designated it, go to your Ordinary Form parish and see a priest there.  the EF and OF are both Catholic; we all belong to the One Holy Catholic and Apostolic Church, subject to the Pope and the Magisterium. 

an OF priest can hear your confession, give you absolution, and assign you a penance.  confess the many times you have given in to your temptation to read about satanism.  also confess that you have omitted these sins from past confessions.  ask him for advice on dealing with the temptations.  even if the priest doesn't believe in satan's existence, thinks of satan as only a symbol of evil, he should recognize that your thoughts are disordered and be able to offer help.  he may suggest that you see a therapist and that could be helpful.  ask him about Catholic therapists if he mentions therapy.  and atheist or agnostic would not be good for your case.

maybe EF priests deal with the demonic more often, but you need to confess, be absolved, and be assigned a penance, ASAP, and an OF priest can do that for you.  if you were cut and bleeding profusely, you'd go to the nearest hospital for stitches, not drive for hours to get to a hospital you like better.  you can go to an EF priest later if you feel the need and have access to one.

if i were in your situation, sought help from my OF parish pastor and wasn't satisfied with all he told me, i would go home and make a long distance call to a priest who says the EF, ask his advice by phone.


are all your sacramentals blessed?  if not, take them along and have the priest bless them. wear your blessed St. Benedict medal and blessed crucifix all the time, along with any other blessed medals and scapulars you have (be sure you're enrolled in the scapular if necessary.)  got your blessed palm from Palm Sunday?  tuck it under your mattress or behind the crucifix on your bedroom wall.  it's a sacramental.

tuck your blessed rosary under your pillow at night. if you wake up, it will be handy for prayer.  pray five decades a day if you possibly can.  if you're too distracted right now, start off by saying the Our Father, Three Hail Marys, and Prayer to your Guardian Angel at night.  it's even better if you say them in the morning, too.

all the things we're talking about in this thread are to build a wall of spiritual protection around you.

i suggest that you also post in the Oratory, asking for prayers for you in battling this obsession.  keep us posted on how you're doing.  i'll be praying for you and others will, too.

Pax et Bonum


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#13
(04-21-2010, 11:16 PM)richness of tradition Wrote: I read stuff about Satanism all the time on the internet, it seems to fascinate me.
What do you mean by "about Satanism"?

I highly recommend every Christian study the forces of evil. I suggest this: http://www.amazon.com/Exorcist-Tells-His...=8-1-fkmr1

Quote:I'm not trying to be overly dramatic but could I be possessed?
No.

Quote:It's a frightening thing to think S*tan himself may have in interest in me but also there's an intoxicating thrill to it I have to admit.  That's a horrible thing to say I know.
That may be natural, but that sort of personal interest is unlikely. Demons are always in our midst.

Counter study with the guardian angels. That can be even more thrilling.
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#14
(04-21-2010, 11:16 PM)richness of tradition Wrote: I read stuff about Satanism all the time on the internet, it seems to fascinate me.

If you are using the internet as a tool with your fascination, perhaps you should take a break from the internet entirely.  Disconnect  from the web for a while.  In place of surfing for Satanic topics, go to the library and borrow good traditional Catholic books. 

There is a ton of good on the internet but there's also a ton of evil.  You have to be able to control  temptations on the internet.  If you aren't able to master self control (this also includes porn) then perhaps it's time to disconnect your internet provider completely from your computer.  I've disconnected for certain periods and let me tell you...it did a world of good for me.
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#15
I just wanted to mention that if you are able to get yourself a St. Benedict medal that has been blessed by a Benedictine monk, it actually has an exorcism attached to it. I believe one that has been blessed by a priest does not. I would highly recommend that you get one with an exorcism, under the circumstances in which you find yourself. You could wear it around your neck on a chain, or sew it onto your scapular, if you wear one.

Here is a link to Our Lady of Guadalupe Monastery:

http://www.ourladyofguadalupemonastery.com/

The monks living there are traditional Benedictines and they sell beautiful St. Benedict medals, which they will bless upon request. I have ordered medals from them and was very impressed with the quality, as well as the prompt service. I hope this helps, and may God bless you!
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#16
Talk to your Confessor about this and stop reading bullshit.

One sure sign of a problem is if you feel like hiding this from your Confessor, so force yourself to tell him you have this fascination.  Do it, for sure.  Not necessarily to Confess it as a sin, but to get pastoral advice on dealing with this before you sin or get sucked into it.

As far as power and influence go:

For what is a man advantaged, if he gain the whole world, and lose himself, and cast away himself? (Luke 9:25)

You might get some trinket from the devil, but you're paying with everything.  Don't be a dumbass.
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#17
(04-22-2010, 10:31 AM)TheQueenMother Wrote: I just wanted to mention that if you are able to get yourself a St. Benedict medal that has been blessed by a Benedictine monk, it actually has an exorcism attached to it. I believe one that has been blessed by a priest does not.

The Medal of St. Benedict can be blessed by any ordained priest or a deacon, it does not have to be a Benedictine - as long as the proper blessing has been said.  The proper blessing and other information about the medal and the prayers/abbreviations is found on the osb.org website.

A crucifix with the medal embedded is an incredibly powerful Sacramental.
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#18
(04-22-2010, 11:34 AM)kthrun Wrote:
(04-22-2010, 10:31 AM)TheQueenMother Wrote: I just wanted to mention that if you are able to get yourself a St. Benedict medal that has been blessed by a Benedictine monk, it actually has an exorcism attached to it. I believe one that has been blessed by a priest does not.

The Medal of St. Benedict can be blessed by any ordained priest or a deacon, it does not have to be a Benedictine - as long as the proper blessing has been said.  The proper blessing and other information about the medal and the prayers/abbreviations is found on the osb.org website.

A crucifix with the medal embedded is an incredibly powerful Sacramental.

You get a special grace if it's blessed by a Benedictine, but make sure the Benedictine believes in God first. Sticking tongue out at you
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#19
(04-22-2010, 01:02 AM)Baskerville Wrote: Here's where I will probably get hammered by some but you MUST talk to a TRADITIONAL Priest ASAP most of the NO Priests that I have talked with dont even believe in the devil. Go find a trad Priest I dont care if he is SSPX SSPV CMRI Indi whatever but go talk to one and tell him this is happening and ask him what to do.
That's probably true where you live but not necessarily so everywhere.  The OP definitely needs to talk to a trustworthy priest and he will need to use his judgment about that that means in his situation.
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#20

Thanks to everyone for your suggestions.  I will probably go to confession on Saturday.  One thing that bothers me though is how can I ever look the priest in the eye again after confesssing something like this?  I live in an isolated area with only one priest.  We do have the option of the traditional type of confessional but he'd probably know who I am anyway.

Embarrassed

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