Is a mortal sin actually very hard to commit?
#11
(05-06-2010, 01:48 PM)3Sanctus Wrote: Trying to stay on topic with this question...

When does one begin to fail to "honor they father and they mother"?  To what degree must one comply with their wishes to keep from sinning?  Likewise, to what degree does one have to comply with their wishes for it to be a positive thing (as opposed to simply a lack of sin)?  How is this to be balanced with what you feel God wishes from you in your life - in generalities basically, not things like your parents asking you to commit fornication or some such nonsense.

It is clear that God comes first at all times.

Matthew 10:37-38 Wrote:He that loveth father or mother more than me, is not worthy of me; and he that loveth son or daughter more than me, is not worthy of me.  And he that taketh not up his cross, and followeth me, is not worthy of me.

So, honouring our parents I think largely relies on our attitude towards them and our efforts to follow God.
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#12
(05-06-2010, 09:43 PM)Herr_Mannelig Wrote:
(05-06-2010, 01:48 PM)3Sanctus Wrote: Trying to stay on topic with this question...

When does one begin to fail to "honor they father and they mother"?  To what degree must one comply with their wishes to keep from sinning?  Likewise, to what degree does one have to comply with their wishes for it to be a positive thing (as opposed to simply a lack of sin)?  How is this to be balanced with what you feel God wishes from you in your life - in generalities basically, not things like your parents asking you to commit fornication or some such nonsense.

It is clear that God comes first at all times.

Matthew 10:37-38 Wrote:He that loveth father or mother more than me, is not worthy of me; and he that loveth son or daughter more than me, is not worthy of me.  And he that taketh not up his cross, and followeth me, is not worthy of me.

So, honouring our parents I think largely relies on our attitude towards them and our efforts to follow God.

To be more plain about it...

I feel called to the monastic life.  I'm an only child and basically the idea of me going to live where she'll barely ever see me kills my mother so she lashes out passive aggressively.  I live in her house and have chosen to put off any serious discernment (i.e., discernment outside my own head and heart) until I've moved out of her house, at least partially because I'm too weak-willed against my parents, but also because I feel bad about burdening her while she's letting me life at home.  Am I sinning in this way?  Am I possibly destroying my God-given vocation and damning myself for not rightfully considering God's calling immediately?  (I began feeling this call in college and have put it off a few years already for obvious reasons...I was studying philosophy, which would help a lot should the calling I feel turn out to be what I think it is)

In other words, I'm a guilt-wracked, stressed out 24 year-old guy who feels like he's draw between God and parents and doesn't know how to deal with this...and I work for my dad (parents are divorced Protestants), so that doesn't help much either.
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#13
"Wide is the path that leads to destruction."

Yes, it is easy, why do you think so many people commit them and there are so few saints?
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#14
If it is hard, then I must be really good at it.
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#15
Nope. It's real easy.

Sleep in late on Sunday, then settle in front of TV to watch a game, and when it's time for the last-chance Mass on Sunday (usually some lifeteen crap) decide you'd rather eat dinner now than fast a whole hour and eat after the Mass.

Done.
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#16
People here are equivocating on the word "easy".  cgraye, I think, has the best answer here, right at the beginning.
(05-05-2010, 11:37 PM)cgraye Wrote: It's all relative, really.  If you commit a lot of mortal sins, it gets easier and easier.  Just like anything bad you do.  Or good, for that matter.  And it depends on the person.  Some people have difficulty with things with which other people have no difficulty.  If you train yourself and establish good habits, it may get hard to commit a mortal sin.  If you keep committing the same sins, it will get very easy to commit them again.

What's messed-up with responses like this:
(05-10-2010, 01:46 AM)SoCalLocal Wrote: Nope. It's real easy.

Sleep in late on Sunday, then settle in front of TV to watch a game, and when it's time for the last-chance Mass on Sunday (usually some lifeteen crap) decide you'd rather eat dinner now than fast a whole hour and eat after the Mass.

Done.
is that it ignores whether the person asking the question is at all inclined to do anything of the sort.  Put another way: would you find that easy to do? Procedural simplicity is not equivalent to facility in execution.  (Never mind that "eating dinner" is NOT a sin: if you can still get to Mass and witness the sacrifice, that's your obligation met right there, O thou sloppy exegete --- unless it's the end of Eastertide and you haven't received Our Lord since ... er... help? ... anyways, more and more difficult!)

Do we really have to pull out the definition of mortal sin?  Maybe we do... Let's see... one must
* commit an act of gravely sinful matter
* with full knowledge of its gravity
* with free and deliberate consent of the will.
That's a triple intersection (maybe even quadruple); among people of good will (as I'm sure you all are? HMMM?) it's really not an easy thing to do in spite of its simplicity.  I find in my own examination of conscience I occasionally get past the first two points, and then find "no, I was neither deliberate nor freely consenting"@.  In a variation on the sloth-towards-Truth mentioned above, I'll scold myself for being inattentive.  Then I'll unburden in confession about it anyway, because it's good to do so, but that's not the point!  From the fall our Nature declines away from God, but we aren't wholly ruined either: the natural law remains written on our hearts, and it takes a genuine effort to break it.  To thoroughly reject God's good even for a moment is not natural in us.  It can be done or else Salvation were a waste of Time.

Rules of thumb: if at a reasonable remove from your act you honestly can't tell in five minute's thinking whether a sin was mortal, it probably wasn't.  At The Same Time, if it honestly takes five minutes and you haven't decided it wasn't mortal, stop trying to decide and just take it to the confessional.

That's my twopence' worth.

@ NonNobis makes no representation that his private EofC is sufficiently honest nor thorough, nor does he presume upon his own salvation.  This is just an expression of his hope.
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#17
(05-06-2010, 09:50 PM)3Sanctus Wrote:
(05-06-2010, 09:43 PM)Herr_Mannelig Wrote:
(05-06-2010, 01:48 PM)3Sanctus Wrote: Trying to stay on topic with this question...

When does one begin to fail to "honor they father and they mother"?  To what degree must one comply with their wishes to keep from sinning?  Likewise, to what degree does one have to comply with their wishes for it to be a positive thing (as opposed to simply a lack of sin)?  How is this to be balanced with what you feel God wishes from you in your life - in generalities basically, ...

It is clear that God comes first at all times.

Matthew 10:37-38 Wrote:He that loveth father or mother more than me, is not worthy of me; and he that loveth son or daughter more than me, is not worthy of me.  And he that taketh not up his cross, and followeth me, is not worthy of me.

So, honouring our parents I think largely relies on our attitude towards them and our efforts to follow God.

To be more plain about it...

I feel called to the monastic life.  I'm an only child and basically the idea of me going to live where she'll barely ever see me kills my mother so she lashes out passive aggressively.  I live in her house and have chosen to put off any serious discernment (i.e., discernment outside my own head and heart) until I've moved out of her house, at least partially because I'm too weak-willed against my parents, but also because I feel bad about burdening her while she's letting me life at home.  Am I sinning in this way?  Am I possibly destroying my God-given vocation and damning myself for not rightfully considering God's calling immediately?  (I began feeling this call in college and have put it off a few years already for obvious reasons...I was studying philosophy, which would help a lot should the calling I feel turn out to be what I think it is)

In other words, I'm a guilt-wracked, stressed out 24 year-old guy who feels like he's draw between God and parents and doesn't know how to deal with this...and I work for my dad (parents are divorced Protestants), so that doesn't help much either.
First off, to answer is it a mortal sin so far, I would say, no.  The fact that you are asking about it is good.  BUT, I am not a priest, so my  main answer would be, ask your priest.  Vocations are really to be discerned with the help of your confessor or spiritual director preferably.  Have you made an Ignatian Retreat?  If not, I highly recommend it.  In the meantime, you mention, "I live in her house and have chosen to put off any serious discernment until I've moved out of her house."  Do you actually have a timeline for moving out?  Is there any particular goal you are trying to achieve in the meantime, like paying off student loans?  (BTW, these questions are rhetorical.)  It does sound like you may be putting off a calling from God, mainly because you just don't want to deal with it, or at least, don't want to deal with the opposition from parents etc...  I would say, not pursuing a calling just to please your parents would be wrong; as Herr M said, God has to come first.  The 4th Commandment does not require saying no to a calling from God to please one's parents.  See the example of St. Thomas Aquinas, among many other Saints.  Given that you are 24, I assume your parents aren't elderly and thus not in need of your care.  Anyway, all of these are questions that a priest could deal with. 

Lastly, there was some Saint who said that basically it is almost impossible to save your soul outside of the state of life which God intended for you.  So, talk to a priest.
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#18
To add to that, although it is a digression from the primary question of this thread:

St. Gregory Nazianzen: “I hold that the choice of a state in life is so important, that it decides for the remainder of our life, whether our conduct will be good or bad.”

St. Alphonsus: “If, in the choice of a state of life, we wish to secure our eternal salvation, we must embrace that state to which God calls us; in which alone God prepares for us the efficacious means necessary to our salvation… God gives to every one his vocation and chooses the state in which he wills him to be saved.”

St. Alphonsus: “It is evident that our eternal salvation depends principally on the choice of our state in life.”

St. Vincent de Paul: “It is very difficult, not to say impossible, to save one’s self in a place, or in a state, in which God does not wish one to be.”
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#19
There seems to be no way of knowing for sure.  Culpability is really something that only God can judge.  We may always ask ourselves, "How much of this decision to sin gravely was of my own free will and how much was my free will overthrown by concupisence and temptation?"  Now, the traditional approach is always the wisest and that approach has always been one in which it is quite easy for us to sin against the Lord and one in which grave sins are usually mortal.  Grave sins which are understood as such turning out to be non-mortal due to some sort of appeal to strong temptation making us not culpable for mortally cutting ourselves off from God is the exception and certainly not the rule.

I agree that grave sins become easier and easier to commit as we go on committing them.  I do think that something may be said for habitual sins and a much more serious loss of free will (and perhaps mortal culpability) in that regard.  It's a deliberate choice for a non-alcoholic to get drunk as heck, but an alcoholic has habituated himself in such a way that he can barely hold himself back from not doing so.  Still, the fact that he has progressed to such a point is one which he and his actions are at least partly responsible for and thus his lifestyle still rests on his shoulders (even if individual sins at the point may not be mortal).
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#20
(05-10-2010, 01:46 AM)SoCalLocal Wrote: Nope. It's real easy.

Sleep in late on Sunday, then settle in front of TV to watch a game, and when it's time for the last-chance Mass on Sunday (usually some lifeteen crap) decide you'd rather eat dinner now than fast a whole hour and eat after the Mass.

Done.

Actually, it would be a bigger sin to go to one of those garbage lifeteen masses. It's not a sin not to go to a protestant service.

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