My husband, Jesus and original sin
#41
Hello every one. I am new to the site and could not help but notice... she really has not gotten many options here has she?

Marriages have ups and downs, some worst than others, that does not mean she has to give up (which is also an option of free will). It is my humble opinion that she has a task ahead of her, save her family and those around her. You can not go in to battle without supplies. Simply put, arm yourself with the Lord. Seek him, learn about him. Right now you are being tested in your faith. When you read the bible, also read the preface to each book and read the footnotes they explain many things in The New American Bible.

I recently read a book called "Why do Catholics Do That" A Guide to the Teachings and Practices of the Catholic Church, written by: Kevin Orlin Johnson, Ph.D. explains many things but kept me wanting more. I also read "23 minutes in hell" about a guy who experienced the journey and was told to warn us about it. If you believe the author of "23 minutes in hell" or not, it should open our eyes to why we should fear it.

Keep praying for guidance and don't loose your faith.
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#42
Glad that you liked my book, and that you want more! Check Amazon.com--I've written subsequent books that you might find helpful. Thanks! Keep the Faith.
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#43
As far as divorce etc goes, this might be of some interest after about 4 minutes:

http://www.fatherwathen.com/486.html
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#44
I'm just kind of flabbergasted that people - on a Catholic forum - are even suggesting divorce or even separation.  While there are lawful reasons for it, that's something that should be discussed with a priest and all the specifics given because it is an extreme solutin.

It could be life is wonderful except for the topic of religion, in which case, that marriage is better than most, and emulation of St. Monica might be a better choice.  It could be this is some mid-life crisis DH is going through, has lasted for a short time, and will be over with in a year when he finds out his mentor likes men or something and his illusions about the Maharishi (sp?) there are shattered.

Besides that, the OP gave no indication that was even a consideration.  Putting ideas like that in people's heads is a bad idea.  It's like being the devil and whispering temptation into someone's ear.  I recommend against it.
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#45
(01-11-2011, 07:01 PM)KevinOrlinJohnson Wrote: Glad that you liked my book, and that you want more! Check Amazon.com--I've written subsequent books that you might find helpful. Thanks! Keep the Faith.

I second the recommendation.  That's a good book; nice work, Kevin.
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#46
(01-12-2011, 03:23 PM)QuisUtDeus Wrote: I'm just kind of flabbergasted that people - on a Catholic forum - are even suggesting divorce or even separation. 

I'm flabbergasted that people on a Catholic forum condone abuse.
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#47
(01-12-2011, 07:05 PM)Iolanthe Wrote:
(01-12-2011, 03:23 PM)QuisUtDeus Wrote: I'm just kind of flabbergasted that people - on a Catholic forum - are even suggesting divorce or even separation. 

I'm flabbergasted that people on a Catholic forum condone abuse.

I don't recall anyone condoning abuse.  I think you're reading something that isn't there.  Can you quote someone saying he's doing the right thing by treating her that way or that his behavior is no big deal?

Edited: to reflect Iolanthe's updated comment.
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#48
(01-12-2011, 07:07 PM)QuisUtDeus Wrote:
(01-12-2011, 07:05 PM)Iolanthe Wrote:
(01-12-2011, 03:23 PM)QuisUtDeus Wrote: I'm just kind of flabbergasted that people - on a Catholic forum - are even suggesting divorce or even separation. 

I'm flabbergasted that people on a Catholic forum condone abuse.

I don't recall anyone condoning abuse.  I think you're reading something that isn't there.  Can you quote someone saying he's doing the right thing by treating her that way or that his behavior is no big deal?

Edited: to reflect Iolanthe's updated comment.

Well, I never said anyone said that, so I'm not falling into that one.

The general reactions from people here is that she would be doing something terrible if she left him, even after the way he's been treating her. Even more importantly, she wants to become Catholic and can't because of the way he's bullying her.

Where are the priorities here? She needs to stand up for herself and save her soul, and obviously being in the house with him is not working.

It's not working, people. IT. IS. NOT. WORKING.

How many years of abuse do there need to be before it's not a "sin" to get a separation? Does he have to actually hit her? Does he have to threaten her life? Is it okay then, or will she still be a bad wife if she tries to leave him?

Most of the advice here is aimed more at enabling an abuser than it is about anything else.
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#49
(01-12-2011, 07:21 PM)Iolanthe Wrote:
(01-12-2011, 07:07 PM)QuisUtDeus Wrote:
(01-12-2011, 07:05 PM)Iolanthe Wrote:
(01-12-2011, 03:23 PM)QuisUtDeus Wrote: I'm just kind of flabbergasted that people - on a Catholic forum - are even suggesting divorce or even separation. 

I'm flabbergasted that people on a Catholic forum condone abuse.

I don't recall anyone condoning abuse.  I think you're reading something that isn't there.  Can you quote someone saying he's doing the right thing by treating her that way or that his behavior is no big deal?

Edited: to reflect Iolanthe's updated comment.

Well, I never said anyone said that, so I'm not falling into that one.

OK, well, let's figure out what you said, whether you realize it or not, before I comment on what you've added.

Condone:

Quote:: to regard or treat (something bad or blameworthy) as acceptable, forgivable, or harmless

Has anyone said or treated the abuse as: acceptable, forgivable or harmless?  Yes or no?

If no, and you want to use different wording, fine.  I'm objecting to your characterization that abuse was somehow condoned which has a specific meaning.  If that's not what you meant, fair enough.
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#50
(01-12-2011, 08:43 PM)QuisUtDeus Wrote: OK, well, let's figure out what you said, whether you realize it or not, before I comment on what you've added.

Condone:

Quote:: to regard or treat (something bad or blameworthy) as acceptable, forgivable, or harmless

Has anyone said or treated the abuse as: acceptable, forgivable or harmless?  Yes or no?

If no, and you want to use different wording, fine.  I'm objecting to your characterization that abuse was somehow condoned which has a specific meaning.  If that's not what you meant, fair enough.

You can condone something by not condemning it. That's what it means by "treat....as acceptable." The problem is what is NOT being said, and what is being brushed aside.
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