foreplay in the sexual act
#71
When it comes to sexual relations, it's better to play it safe since they are the cause of perdition to many a soul.

In short, I'd say these are the safest guidelines:

1) Between husband and wife alone (no brainer here);
2) No birth control or even NFP;
3) "Missionary" position alone. Avoid positions that mimic animal copulation, no matter how "exciting" or "harmless" they may seem at first;
4) Avoid needless foreplay, especially oral stimulation that degrades the other spouse;
5) If you can't have any more children, abstain from sex;
6) Try to see the spiritual person in the other spouse to avoid degrading him/her to a sexual object that satisfies your needs.
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#72
(04-14-2011, 09:07 PM)Vetus Ordo Wrote: 3) "Missionary" position alone. Avoid positions that mimic animal copulation, no matter how "exciting" or "harmless" they may seem at first;
Um, some species copulate face to face.

Also, people have different physiologies.

Quote:5) If you can't have any more children, abstain from sex;

Genesis 17:17-19 Wrote:Abraham fell upon his face, and laughed, saying in his heart: Shall a son, thinkest thou, be born to him that is a hundred years old? and shall Sara that is ninety years old bring forth? And he said to God: O that Ismael may live before thee. And God said to Abraham: Sara thy wife shall bear thee a son, and thou shalt call his name Isaac, and I will establish my covenant with him for a perpetual covenant, and with his seed after him.

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#73
(04-14-2011, 09:07 PM)Vetus Ordo Wrote: When it comes to sexual relations, it's better to play it safe since they are the cause of perdition to many a soul.

In short, I'd say these are the safest guidelines:

1) Between husband and wife alone (no brainer here);
2) No birth control or even NFP;
3) "Missionary" position alone. Avoid positions that mimic animal copulation, no matter how "exciting" or "harmless" they may seem at first;
4) Avoid needless foreplay, especially oral stimulation that degrades the other spouse;
5) If you can't have any more children, abstain from sex;
6) Try to see the spiritual person in the other spouse to avoid degrading him/her to a sexual object that satisfies your needs.
I concur with you on 3 and 4 Vetus. The various goofy positions tend to originate from a pornographic idea of sex for ones own gain. Sex that originates out of spousal love wouldn't need kinky positions. They can degrade or be uncomfortable to one of the spouses. Oral stimulation I've always found to be as dirty as anal sex stuff. It's gross and degrades the spouse into a living sex toy that has no feelings. Although I agree with Rosarium's  post. Some people may have to participate in sex differently because of physical ailments etc.
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#74
(04-14-2011, 09:07 PM)Vetus Ordo Wrote: When it comes to sexual relations, it's better to play it safe since they are the cause of perdition to many a soul.

In short, I'd say these are the safest guidelines:

1) Between husband and wife alone (no brainer here);
2) No birth control or even NFP;
3) "Missionary" position alone. Avoid positions that mimic animal copulation, no matter how "exciting" or "harmless" they may seem at first;
4) Avoid needless foreplay, especially oral stimulation that degrades the other spouse;
5) If you can't have any more children, abstain from sex;
6) Try to see the spiritual person in the other spouse to avoid degrading him/her to a sexual object that satisfies your needs.

I'm curious about #5.   Very unwise.  
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#75
(04-14-2011, 09:20 PM)Rosarium Wrote: Um, some species copulate face to face.

Also, people have different physiologies.

I'm talking about the safest path, not about exceptions. Per default, the "missionary" position is more fitting to marital dignity than any other.

Genesis 17:17-19 Wrote:Abraham fell upon his face, and laughed, saying in his heart: Shall a son, thinkest thou, be born to him that is a hundred years old? and shall Sara that is ninety years old bring forth? And he said to God: O that Ismael may live before thee. And God said to Abraham: Sara thy wife shall bear thee a son, and thou shalt call his name Isaac, and I will establish my covenant with him for a perpetual covenant, and with his seed after him.

I always like to read Scripture but this passage is unrelated to what I was saying.

Abstaining from sex when the couple can no longer have children is meritorious for spiritual reasons. It can be done as a sacrifice. I'm not saying that failing to do so would be sinful, though.
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#76
(04-14-2011, 09:24 PM)Vetus Ordo Wrote:
(04-14-2011, 09:20 PM)Rosarium Wrote: Um, some species copulate face to face.

Also, people have different physiologies.

I'm talking about the safest path, not about exceptions. Per default, the "missionary" position is more fitting to marital dignity than any other.

Genesis 17:17-19 Wrote:Abraham fell upon his face, and laughed, saying in his heart: Shall a son, thinkest thou, be born to him that is a hundred years old? and shall Sara that is ninety years old bring forth? And he said to God: O that Ismael may live before thee. And God said to Abraham: Sara thy wife shall bear thee a son, and thou shalt call his name Isaac, and I will establish my covenant with him for a perpetual covenant, and with his seed after him.

I always like to read Scripture but this passage is unrelated to what I was saying.

Abstaining from sex when the couple can no longer have children is meritorious for spiritual reasons. It can be done as a sacrifice. I'm not saying that failing to do so would be sinful, though.

Had Abraham and Sara abstained from sex, no child would have been born.  They were open to children, even at an elderly age. 
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#77
I think some here are going waaaaaay beyond what is necessary or required with regard to limitations on sex between a Catholic husband and wife. At least I *shore* hope you are.
Oh my Jesus, I surrender myself to you. Take care of everything.--Fr Dolindo Ruotolo

Persevere..Eucharist, Holy Rosary, Brown Scapular, Confession. You will win.
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#78
(04-14-2011, 09:28 PM)Loriveronica Wrote:
(04-14-2011, 09:24 PM)Vetus Ordo Wrote:
(04-14-2011, 09:20 PM)Rosarium Wrote: Um, some species copulate face to face.

Also, people have different physiologies.

I'm talking about the safest path, not about exceptions. Per default, the "missionary" position is more fitting to marital dignity than any other.

Genesis 17:17-19 Wrote:Abraham fell upon his face, and laughed, saying in his heart: Shall a son, thinkest thou, be born to him that is a hundred years old? and shall Sara that is ninety years old bring forth? And he said to God: O that Ismael may live before thee. And God said to Abraham: Sara thy wife shall bear thee a son, and thou shalt call his name Isaac, and I will establish my covenant with him for a perpetual covenant, and with his seed after him.

I always like to read Scripture but this passage is unrelated to what I was saying.

Abstaining from sex when the couple can no longer have children is meritorious for spiritual reasons. It can be done as a sacrifice. I'm not saying that failing to do so would be sinful, though.

Had Abraham and Sara abstained from sex, no child would have been born.  They were open to children, even at an elderly age. 

Had Abraham and Sara abstained from sex in that occasion, they would have been faithless. Abraham had faith in God's promises and, because of that, God operated a miracle and Sara conceived a child. These biblical verses do not serve to establish that Abraham and Sara regularly enganged in the marital act. If nothing else, they seem to indicate otherwise given Abraham's initial reaction.

Of course, this is all unrelated to the spiritual benefits of abstaining from sex as a spiritual sacrifice once the couple is past their fertile years.
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#79
So... what are a husband and wife to do if one or the other has problems becoming aroused?
What if the wife does become aroused, but is unable to self lubricate enough for the marital act?  Are they doomed to sad, disappointing, and even painful sex for the duration of their marriage?  Because, IMHO, that leads to not engaging in the marital act at all.
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#80
The guidelines I posted are general and they're meant to be taken so.

Trying to constantly find loopholes when it comes to these matters of the flesh manifests a disturbing lack of detachment from worldly pleasures and a sure sign that the person is not walking the strait path that leads to life.
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