What to do when a friend leaves the Faith
#11
(11-15-2013, 10:57 AM)voltape Wrote:
(11-14-2013, 08:12 PM)mamalove Wrote: the woman I sponsored for Confirmation left the Church for protestantism.  It upset me so much.  I did what I could to try to reach her and talk to her, but I know she knows the truth.  With our priest and with all the resources I gave her, both before and after she left,  she was given a full and rich Traditional formation.  My spiritual director told me that I had done all I could, I should pray for her, but because it was causing me such anxiety to be in continuing contact with her that it was ok to back away from the friendship.
There you have!    " ok to back away from the friendship" - - Has your friend become a bad person? a murderer? a thief? Probably not.  She probably is as good as always, only that she has changed beliefs for something that she, sincerely, thinks is better. Both she and you worship the same God.  Why shatter a good friendship?

like I said, it was the anxiety that it caused me from hearing her talk about heresy as truth.  This was the advice from my confessor and spiritual director who knew many more details about the situation that I care to share here.
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#12
(11-15-2013, 08:19 PM)mamalove Wrote:
(11-15-2013, 10:57 AM)voltape Wrote:
(11-14-2013, 08:12 PM)mamalove Wrote: the woman I sponsored for Confirmation left the Church for protestantism.  It upset me so much.  I did what I could to try to reach her and talk to her, but I know she knows the truth.  With our priest and with all the resources I gave her, both before and after she left,  she was given a full and rich Traditional formation.  My spiritual director told me that I had done all I could, I should pray for her, but because it was causing me such anxiety to be in continuing contact with her that it was ok to back away from the friendship.
There you have!    " ok to back away from the friendship" - - Has your friend become a bad person? a murderer? a thief? Probably not.  She probably is as good as always, only that she has changed beliefs for something that she, sincerely, thinks is better. Both she and you worship the same God.  Why shatter a good friendship?

like I said, it was the anxiety that it caused me from hearing her talk about heresy as truth.  This was the advice from my confessor and spiritual director who knew many more details about the situation that I care to share here.
Confession can be a very risky practice.  A priest has to hear lots of confessions.  He has but a few minutes to pay attention to your case.  You cannot go to him with complicate problems.  He is not a psychologist and no serious psychologist would dare give you advice in a hurry.  He may unwillingly mislead you.  Go to confession in case you have murdered, shouted blasphemies, committed adultery, or something of the sort.  For minor faults, please, give some credit to good old Jesus.  He too can forgive you.
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#13
(11-16-2013, 12:37 PM)voltape Wrote:
(11-15-2013, 08:19 PM)mamalove Wrote:
(11-15-2013, 10:57 AM)voltape Wrote:
(11-14-2013, 08:12 PM)mamalove Wrote: the woman I sponsored for Confirmation left the Church for protestantism.  It upset me so much.  I did what I could to try to reach her and talk to her, but I know she knows the truth.  With our priest and with all the resources I gave her, both before and after she left,  she was given a full and rich Traditional formation.  My spiritual director told me that I had done all I could, I should pray for her, but because it was causing me such anxiety to be in continuing contact with her that it was ok to back away from the friendship.
There you have!    " ok to back away from the friendship" - - Has your friend become a bad person? a murderer? a thief? Probably not.  She probably is as good as always, only that she has changed beliefs for something that she, sincerely, thinks is better. Both she and you worship the same God.  Why shatter a good friendship?

like I said, it was the anxiety that it caused me from hearing her talk about heresy as truth.  This was the advice from my confessor and spiritual director who knew many more details about the situation that I care to share here.
Confession can be a very risky practice.  A priest has to hear lots of confessions.  He has but a few minutes to pay attention to your case.  You cannot go to him with complicate problems.  He is not a psychologist and no serious psychologist would dare give you advice in a hurry.  He may unwillingly mislead you.  Go to confession in case you have murdered, shouted blasphemies, committed adultery, or something of the sort.  For minor faults, please, give some credit to good old Jesus.  He too can forgive you.

That's not true.  Confession gives you special grace to persevere against sin.  It is easier to fight the battle with those graces even if you have only confessed venial sin.  I believe these sins are forgiven after the Confiteor at Mass but you still get extra grace when you go to confession and there's no need to go without it.  That's not to say it should be mutually exclusive to counseling if you need counseling.  Priests are not trained to treat mental illness however they are trained to care for peoples' souls.  I always go to confession by appointment now since I don't fit into most confessionals with my wheelchair but before I was in that situation I found that if you're in the confession line the advice you get is uslaly not very specific and very brief... Many don't give it at all, in the interest of making sure every person gets the Sacrament before Mass. 
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