Finding a good, Catholic wife
#1
Hi FE,

Well, this is my first post here :grin:.

Anyway, I should note that I, like many (most, more like) of you, am a very traditional Catholic, although I'm in full communion with the See of Rome, since "He who is not at peace with the Roman Church shall not be considered Catholic" (Dictatus Papae, S. Gregory PP. VII, 1075).

Well, I've started to search for a good, devout (and pretty :)) Catholic wife, and I've finding it to be terribly difficult. Supposedly, there's a lot of devout young women seeking a husband, so it should be no problem, but it's very hard for me. I'm a young man who as a very austere spirituality, and am much more mature for my age than others (I don't say this to brag, I've been told this by many). I hate pretty much anything mundane. I don't really like movies, and am not into Family Guy, Call of Duty, or whatever other guys my age do these days.

Anyway, first I'd ask you to keep me in your prayers,
but second, any advice as to what to do. I'm in college and I don't drive, so it's not exactly easy to get out of here (very rural campus)?
Are there any pretty, devout young woman out there who would actually appreciate me? Do they exist?

Latinitas


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#2
If God wills for you to marry, then she is out there.  Spend your time working on yourself, building your career and cultivating virtues.  Pray for your future wife.  And if God has some other vocation out there for you then I don't think your prayers are wasted... but some men find it is easier to stay pure and focused when they imagine that God is already preparing a woman's heart to marry you as He is also forming you and guiding you.
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#3
I feel for ya, buddy. I'm in a similar boat except considering perhaps age and austerity (I've fallen into great laxity actually.) My suggestion, from years of life rather than years of wisdom, wait until you're done with college and firmly established in your career, job, trade or business and have enough money to afford to start a family. Take heed to learn the cardinal virtue of prudence as well as forgiveness. If you're in college at the normal age then you have time enough if not a lot of it. Maybe check out TraditionalSingles.com, sspxsingles.com or CatholicMatch.com
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#4
(01-31-2014, 10:40 PM)Latinitas Wrote: Hi FE,

Well, this is my first post here :grin:.

Anyway, I should note that I, like many (most, more like) of you, am a very traditional Catholic, although I'm in full communion with the See of Rome, since "He who is not at peace with the Roman Church shall not be considered Catholic" (Dictatus Papae, S. Gregory PP. VII, 1075).

Well, I've started to search for a good, devout (and pretty :)) Catholic wife, and I've finding it to be terribly difficult. Supposedly, there's a lot of devout young women seeking a husband, so it should be no problem, but it's very hard for me. I'm a young man who as a very austere spirituality, and am much more mature for my age than others (I don't say this to brag, I've been told this by many). I hate pretty much anything mundane. I don't really like movies, and am not into Family Guy, Call of Duty, or whatever other guys my age do these days.

Anyway, first I'd ask you to keep me in your prayers,
but second, any advice as to what to do. I'm in college and I don't drive, so it's not exactly easy to get out of here (very rural campus)?
Are there any pretty, devout young woman out there who would actually appreciate me? Do they exist?

Latinitas

The ancient legends speak of such beings.   :LOL:

However, I'd advise that getting your own life in order is half the battle.  Literally.  Careful while in college.  You might meet an eager younger one who fits your ideal but then may later decide she hasn't been a single adult long enough and wants to enjoy that before getting married. 

You shouldn't rely on "milestones" in life to judge whether or not you're ready, because I keep hearing from every single Catholic couple: they weren't ready.  They weren't ready for kids, they weren't ready for married life, they weren't ready for this or that.  No amount of financial "security", job "security", "education", or whatever other so called "milestones" in life were enough to get them ready.

You're not capable of being ready.  None of us is.  I'm guessing it's one of many reasons as to why marriage is a sacrament.  Only God's grace can hold together the interactions of two fallen beings, whether they be siblings, friends or even married couples.

I keep hearing things from married Catholics.  Prayer, cooperating with God's grace, making Him top priority in BOTH your lives, and coming to the realization that it's ultimately the DECISION to love that plays the most important factor.  Because love is an action, not an emotion.

Unless both potential spouses realize this, it's not likely to turn out well, no matter how "compatible" you both are.

EDIT

So, to conclude... put God on the top of your priorities.  Everything should fall into place.  Find a girl who agrees, has the same plans in life, and is both somehow "compatible" and also "complimentary", so that whiel you both go together well, you also both have strengths that compensate for the weaknesses of the other.
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#5
In my opinion you should give a chance to dating services. I think that there is a great opportunity to find a life partner there. Pay attention to this source  There is a large selection of reviews of different dating services. I think that you will be able to find something suitable.
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#6
There are lots of pretty girls out there.  Good luck finding one in the USA who's actually an orthodox virgin trying to remain out of mortal sin.  It's better to be continent if you will.

Also, this is not a trick question or written to belittle you in any way, but why do you want to marry?  Do you need a son?  Are you ready to see to the care of your wife and children on your own?  Do you already know how to raise a catholic family in orthodoxy and guide your wife to spiritual perfection?

These are just things you should consider, as your wife and children will be dependent upon you for quite a lot, just as you and the children will be dependent upon your wife for a lot.
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#7
Wink 
:heart:
I have a real story. 2 years ago I use the dating sites for find simple and fast one night stand. For example, BeNaughty
But it looks like fun for me because now I have a wife and we are dated on this site. And despite the fact that BeNaughty is the site for fast relationship I was married
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#8
I feel for you. I found a great guy on Catholic Match, so I would give dating sites a try. And I wish you the best of luck finding a woman who isn't a ho or a feminist (even the Catholic ones can be closet feminists!)

It's a tough world out there for a good man. I wish you the best, and you will be in my prayers.


St. Mary of Egypt, Ora Pro Nobis!







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#9
Of course, such women exist. Probably, it's not high time for you yet. Just wait for the right person, and she will surely step in your life. But this does not mean you should sit, and wait and pray for your Devout wife. You can continue searching for her, but perhaps it's better to narrow your research down. Earlier you mentioned that you study at college and aren't fond of modern cinematography, video games, etc. Have you tried to look for a woman at sites for educated people? Since you’re a college student, it might be the right choice for you. Maybe there is a woman, who also wants to find a highly intelligent soulmate. And dating websites/apps like eHarmony or It’s Just Lunch was created exactly for such purposes. By the way, they are considered to be one of the best in regard to this review, https://datingtop10.net/professionals/ . So, try that. Who knows, maybe you'll manage to find a young woman, who is Catholic just like you are.
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#10
Don't dismiss the idea of getting a so-called "mail order bride" from the Phillippines. I personally know two men who have done this and they are very happily married with lots of beautiful children.


St. Mary of Egypt, Ora Pro Nobis!







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