How easy is it for guys to make friends?
#11


(08-20-2014, 05:21 AM)RyanPatrick Wrote:
(08-19-2014, 11:23 PM)LoneWolfRadTrad Wrote:
(08-19-2014, 02:31 PM)RyanPatrick Wrote:
(08-17-2014, 11:06 PM)LoneWolfRadTrad Wrote: I have no problems making friends.  But making friends who are Catholic are a bit different.

Why do you think this is the case?

They say today's men have become effeminate.  With today's theology, especially with the spread of charismatic groups, anti-death penalty, and anti-crusade mentalities among Catholics, this is even true for Catholic young men.  They're a bunch of overly sensitive wussies and pushovers. 

That, or they're overworked snobs who don't really seem to care for the faith outside of Mass and scoff at anything outside their country club, private school neoconservatism for serious discussion.

It's difficult to find those rare, anti-enlightenment, "let's get a beer and shoot guns", Catholic young men who try to place the faith in their daily life.

Maybe you're expecting too much from your friends? Surely it is possible for you to be friends with someone who errs in some ways -- or, if not erring, differ from you -- and you can show them a good example of how to act?

???  I'm not expecting too much, my Catholic friends where I live are great.  But IN CASE I need to move away, everywhere else I've seen, the Catholic young men seem to fall into the bad categories I've mentioned.

(08-20-2014, 07:36 AM)Renatus Frater Wrote: So basically a non-effeminate man would be one who would handle a gun while drunk?
No offense, but isn't your idea of what real men should be doing a caricature in reaction to modern men (who in a real sense are indeed effeminate)?

I know plenty of normal Catholic guys, though I'm not exactly friends, in the deep sense of friendship. Its easier entertaining – you know, giving dinners, etc. – when in a couple, so maybe when, God willing, I get married I might make more friends.

Caricature?  My friends where I currently live are caricatures?  No, that's really just the culture around here.  It's not some macho, show off contest, it's just really what people do here.

And yes, I'm talking about close friends, not the "oh, I made friends with this one classmate" type friends.

One of them just graduated with a philosophy degree and is only becoming more and more of a traditionalist as time goes by.  Another one is seriously considering joining the Fraternity of Saint Peter or another similar group.  Another one is from hillbilly stock, but he has a PhD in biochemistry. 

Those are my closest young male Catholic friends, none of whom are wussy pushovers, aside from the moments every normal human being gets, but those are exceptional to their normal behaviors. 

We get together, we talk Catholic social doctrine, we get drinks, we shoot guns out in the country, we invite others who may be more or less likeminded to come hang out with us, we'll talk traditionalism, we'll pray, we'll go to Mass together sometimes, and we all live in the same city. 

But... if I need to move away, from what I've seen in other Catholic areas, the things I stated above seem to be the norm.

I have more Catholic friends, both men and women of various ages, than them, but not as close.  Some are definitely friends I can do favors for, and they'll do favors for me, but not part of this closer group.  And there's some Catholics who are just acquaintances.  I also have non-Catholic friends on all these levels.

Again, I'm asking in case I need to leave for my career.  It's good to have people you know will have your back, can intellectually connect with, joke around with, and won't wuss out on you in things as small as debates with others or things as severe as someone threatening physical violence.

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#12
(08-20-2014, 07:58 PM)LoneWolfRadTrad Wrote: Caricature?  My friends where I currently live are caricatures?  No, that's really just the culture around here.  It's not some macho, show off contest, it's just really what people do here.

And yes, I'm talking about close friends, not the "oh, I made friends with this one classmate" type friends.

One of them just graduated with a philosophy degree and is only becoming more and more of a traditionalist as time goes by.  Another one is seriously considering joining the Fraternity of Saint Peter or another similar group.  Another one is from hillbilly stock, but he has a PhD in biochemistry. 

Those are my closest young male Catholic friends, none of whom are wussy pushovers, aside from the moments every normal human being gets, but those are exceptional to their normal behaviors. 

We get together, we talk Catholic social doctrine, we get drinks, we shoot guns out in the country, we invite others who may be more or less likeminded to come hang out with us, we'll talk traditionalism, we'll pray, we'll go to Mass together sometimes, and we all live in the same city. 

But... if I need to move away, from what I've seen in other Catholic areas, the things I stated above seem to be the norm.

I have more Catholic friends, both men and women of various ages, than them, but not as close.  Some are definitely friends I can do favors for, and they'll do favors for me, but not part of this closer group.  And there's some Catholics who are just acquaintances.  I also have non-Catholic friends on all these levels.

Again, I'm asking in case I need to leave for my career.  It's good to have people you know will have your back, can intellectually connect with, joke around with, and won't wuss out on you in things as small as debates with others or things as severe as someone threatening physical violence.

Well, one must remember that caricatures can be incarnated in real people.
But if drinking and shooting is indeed just something people of your area do naturally, you shouldn't say this is what real men do. To deduce this from the former implies what I said.

Also, if physical violence is a constant danger to you – so much so that your friends must be qualified for fighting – I suggest you take it easy on the drinking and shooting. And don't worry, that won't make you a woman or a homosexual person.
Good luck, then.
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#13
(08-20-2014, 07:58 PM)LoneWolfRadTrad Wrote: Again, I'm asking in case I need to leave for my career.  It's good to have people you know will have your back, can intellectually connect with, joke around with, and won't wuss out on you in things as small as debates with others or things as severe as someone threatening physical violence.

It sounds like you have a great group of friends that are worth staying with.  Respectfully, if you're considering leaving them for a career, perhaps your priorities are not where they should be.  Not everyone gets to have the kind of close friends that it sounds like you have.  I wouldn't be willing to leave them for a job.
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#14
(08-21-2014, 09:05 PM)Melkite Wrote:
(08-20-2014, 07:58 PM)LoneWolfRadTrad Wrote: Again, I'm asking in case I need to leave for my career.  It's good to have people you know will have your back, can intellectually connect with, joke around with, and won't wuss out on you in things as small as debates with others or things as severe as someone threatening physical violence.

It sounds like you have a great group of friends that are worth staying with.  Respectfully, if you're considering leaving them for a career, perhaps your priorities are not where they should be.  Not everyone gets to have the kind of close friends that it sounds like you have.  I wouldn't be willing to leave them for a job.

Good point.  But it's really between staying here and not finding any work or other things I'm searching for, or going somewhere that those things are available. 

Also, is Renatus a troll or something? 
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#15
On the other side of the coin, you should remember that there are cultural differences everywhere and while I would never suggest that you abandon all the is good about your culture, it can be useful to accept and enjoy the culture of others when you are surrounded by them. "When in Rome" in other words.
"Punishment is justice for the unjust." Saint Augustine of Hippo
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#16
(08-22-2014, 01:26 AM)LoneWolfRadTrad Wrote: Good point.  But it's really between staying here and not finding any work or other things I'm searching for, or going somewhere that those things are available. 

Also, is Renatus a troll or something?

Yes, I'm a troll, just because I disagree with you  :eyeroll:
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#17
(08-24-2014, 08:04 PM)Renatus Frater Wrote:
(08-22-2014, 01:26 AM)LoneWolfRadTrad Wrote: Good point.  But it's really between staying here and not finding any work or other things I'm searching for, or going somewhere that those things are available. 

Also, is Renatus a troll or something?

Yes, I'm a troll, just because I disagree with you  :eyeroll:

No... because you're coming to bad conclusions and doing so by completely going out of your way to misinterpret my posts.  And you're doing it insistently.
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#18
(08-25-2014, 02:31 PM)LoneWolfRadTrad Wrote:
(08-24-2014, 08:04 PM)Renatus Frater Wrote:
(08-22-2014, 01:26 AM)LoneWolfRadTrad Wrote: Good point.  But it's really between staying here and not finding any work or other things I'm searching for, or going somewhere that those things are available. 

Also, is Renatus a troll or something?

Yes, I'm a troll, just because I disagree with you  :eyeroll:

No... because you're coming to bad conclusions and doing so by completely going out of your way to misinterpret my posts.  And you're doing it insistently.

By insistently you mean twice? That is, I disagree with you twice on this thread.
Also, you must not remember this, but on that thread where you speak of talking to a liberal Catholic girl I was the only one who defended you.
But now I disagree. That's life. It doesn't mean I'm out to get you or something.
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#19
(08-25-2014, 02:49 PM)Renatus Frater Wrote:
(08-25-2014, 02:31 PM)LoneWolfRadTrad Wrote:
(08-24-2014, 08:04 PM)Renatus Frater Wrote:
(08-22-2014, 01:26 AM)LoneWolfRadTrad Wrote: Good point.  But it's really between staying here and not finding any work or other things I'm searching for, or going somewhere that those things are available. 

Also, is Renatus a troll or something?

Yes, I'm a troll, just because I disagree with you  :eyeroll:

No... because you're coming to bad conclusions and doing so by completely going out of your way to misinterpret my posts.  And you're doing it insistently.

By insistently you mean twice? That is, I disagree with you twice on this thread.
Also, you must not remember this, but on that thread where you speak of talking to a liberal Catholic girl I was the only one who defended you.
But now I disagree. That's life. It doesn't mean I'm out to get you or something.

It's difficult to tell in the trad online world.  Apologies, I've had too many unreasonable conversations with the crazier types online.
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#20
Hail Mary, full of Grace...
"Punishment is justice for the unjust." Saint Augustine of Hippo
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