Men: What Do You Wish Women Really Understood About Men?
#1


Very seriously, list three things you men truly wish women, as a group, understood about men, as a group (outliers aside, of course --and God bless 'em! I love me some outliers!)

Joking around is welcome, as always, but I really do hope for serious answers alongside. What is it that you think most women in general just don't "get" about men as a group?

How badly do the misunderstandings you're describing impact negatively on men's and women's relationships with each other, in general? Have any personal stories about this sort of thing to share? (I know. I used the word "share" on the men's forum. Don't beat me :P )

Are Catholic women, in general, any better at understanding men than secular women, do you think? If so, why?

Which sex do you think understands the complementary sex better -- men or women?

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#2
All of the misunderstandings I've had to deal with are specific to me.  I'm a pretty extreme outlier.

I wouldn't complain so much that women don't understand men, but that women don't understand women.  I.e., women don't know what they want.  But then, it takes time to figure that stuff out.
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#3
(05-22-2014, 01:36 AM)Vox Clamantis Wrote: Very seriously, list three things you men truly wish women, as a group, understood about men, as a group (outliers aside, of course --and God bless 'em! I love me some outliers!)

Joking around is welcome, as always, but I really do hope for serious answers alongside. What is it that you think most women in general just don't "get" about men as a group?

How badly do the misunderstandings you're describing impact negatively on men's and women's relationships with each other, in general? Have any personal stories about this sort of thing to share? (I know. I used the word "share" on the men's forum. Don't beat me :P )

Are Catholic women, in general, any better at understanding men than secular women, do you think? If so, why?

Which sex do you think understands the complementary sex better -- men or women?

Interesting topic!

Here's my list:
1. We're not out to "get you." Of all the issues of interest to us, they don't all revolve around you.
2. We don't appreciate "man jokes." We may fire back with "women jokes" but that is only to cover the gash you just inflicted.
3. We listen a lot better than you think, but don't like to weigh in unless we're absolutely sure of what we're about to commit to. We don't think aloud.

Honestly (not be offensive), I think Catholic women understand men less so than their counterparts. The reason is most Church activities are sharply divided between "men's ministries (a.k.a. pasta parties) and "women's ministries (whatever they are)." The Church focuses so darn much on the differences that our shared nature gets overlooked, and we forget its there. There is little that reflects on the meshing of men and women that doesn't become an incendiary list of "men do this" and "women do that." I think it is much like the way we pontificate about the Father and the Son, but are largely ignorant about the other person, the Holy Spirit. The Father and the Son are different, but one through the Holy Spirit. Some people are even ignorant enough to call the Holy Spirit an "it." 
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#4
1. We don't like you more because of whatever your career is or whatever degree you are studying for. It's your Looks #1, and then for actually marrying you your personally does play a big role.
(it always makes me laugh at 23 year olds girls who come home and talk about "everyone was so nice to me today!!!! everyone (men) was trying to help me!!!" in the store, at the gas station, etc. etc." Trust me if you were 65 they wouldn't be so nice)

2. Women definitely do not get men's ability to criticize/analyze something while seeing the good qualities also. I think it's part of how men compartmentalize things while women just take everything as a whole:
Ex.:
Man: Fr. EmotionalHomily is a good pro life priest but I think his homilies are a little bit over the top emotional sometimes I think, he should talk about doctrine more.
Woman: What! I love Fr. Emotional it was such a moving story!
Man: Yes I like him too I just think this one part could be better.
Woman: Whatever he's an amazing priest!

3. I guess we would wish that women could understand how men just need very basic things from their wives but need them often -> sex, food. We don't need 43 things to line up perfectly for us to have a good day like women seem to. (The whole womanly: I got up early today, felt great, had coffee, chatted with my mom, helped the kids to school, saw a friend, had a good conversation, picked some flowers, took a good photo, saw a cool story on facebook, (omg I love the pope), got a great deal on my shopping, the kids had good grades today, you sent me a funny text that made me laugh, you got home early we played with the kids, we made dinner together then chatted while the kids played, had a nice family prayer time that was so nice, had a little chocolate at night, got to bed at a good time) wow what a great day she says.

Man: (had a delicious dinner today wife looked great and we had sex) wow what a great day he says




In general I think Catholic women definitely understand men a lot better than most. Catholic girls have been drummed with the "Sex is holy" thing and it's rare to find a frigid catholic girl.  As long as she is attracted to you sex should be pretty available in general. Definitely more than most. Catholic girls also generally get the whole food thing as well. Honestly if women do that and don't nag and just be even slightly submissive the man is going to be happy.

I actually think Catholic women understand men better than Catholic men understand Catholic women.

Some men don't really get what women want and they flounder. There's a certain percentage of men that just don't get ANYTHING about women, whereas it seems virtually all Catholic women know the basics of what men want. I think men struggle with not knowing what women want, whereas women struggle with actually giving men what they want.
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#5
(05-24-2014, 02:44 PM)Chi Rho Wrote: 1. We don't like you more because of whatever your career is or whatever degree you are studying for. It's your Looks #1, and then for actually marrying you your personally does play a big role.
(it always makes me laugh at 23 year olds girls who come home and talk about "everyone was so nice to me today!!!! everyone (men) was trying to help me!!!" in the store, at the gas station, etc. etc." Trust me if you were 65 they wouldn't be so nice)

2. Women definitely do not get men's ability to criticize/analyze something while seeing the good qualities also. I think it's part of how men compartmentalize things while women just take everything as a whole:
Ex.:
Man: Fr. EmotionalHomily is a good pro life priest but I think his homilies are a little bit over the top emotional sometimes I think, he should talk about doctrine more.
Woman: What! I love Fr. Emotional it was such a moving story!
Man: Yes I like him too I just think this one part could be better.
Woman: Whatever he's an amazing priest!

3. I guess we would wish that women could understand how men just need very basic things from their wives but need them often -> sex, food. We don't need 43 things to line up perfectly for us to have a good day like women seem to. (The whole womanly: I got up early today, felt great, had coffee, chatted with my mom, helped the kids to school, saw a friend, had a good conversation, picked some flowers, took a good photo, saw a cool story on facebook, (omg I love the pope), got a great deal on my shopping, the kids had good grades today, you sent me a funny text that made me laugh, you got home early we played with the kids, we made dinner together then chatted while the kids played, had a nice family prayer time that was so nice, had a little chocolate at night, got to bed at a good time) wow what a great day she says.

Man: (had a delicious dinner today wife looked great and we had sex) wow what a great day he says




In general I think Catholic women definitely understand men a lot better than most. Catholic girls have been drummed with the "Sex is holy" thing and it's rare to find a frigid catholic girl.  As long as she is attracted to you sex should be pretty available in general. Definitely more than most. Catholic girls also generally get the whole food thing as well. Honestly if women do that and don't nag and just be even slightly submissive the man is going to be happy.

I actually think Catholic women understand men better than Catholic men understand Catholic women.

Some men don't really get what women want and they flounder. There's a certain percentage of men that just don't get ANYTHING about women, whereas it seems virtually all Catholic women know the basics of what men want. I think men struggle with not knowing what women want, whereas women struggle with actually giving men what they want.

Dude you are WAYYY off here! Looks matter more TO YOU! Personally, I'm 28 and would sooner hold a door for a 65+ woman than today's 20 somethings. The 65+ women generally respect and appreciate men A LOT more than the 20-50's. I'd rather here "thank you for being such a wonderful man" from a woman of 70 than a "do this for me and I'll shake my behind for you" from a woman of 25. As far as food goes, I'm Italian so cooking is genetic for me bub.

Lastly, as much as I have a "sunny disposition" when it comes to women, I certainly cannot find your words to be very honorable. You greatly underestimate the potential of women and it comes as no shock that you claim you "can't understand them."
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#6
I know people generally like to think they're less shallow than they actually are, but I'd still say that looks are not #1 to me.  That being said most women pale in comparison to my wife so I don't really care about how most women look.

I'd say when it comes to assumptions women make about men, the one that bothers me the most is the stereotype that men only have "one thing" on our minds.  Yes, with the porn culture being what it is it might look that way.  And sure, men struggle with sexual purity in a different way than women do.  But I hate when men are reduced to sex crazed bundles of testosterone.  People pay attention to how women are seen as objects in our culture but many fail to see that men are stereotyped as objectifiers. 

I also wish women realized how much men often hate being asked the question, "What are you thinking?"  My wife has learned not to ask me this but my mother still asks me all the time.  If I had something to say, I would say it.  If I'm keeping something to myself, I have a good reason.  If you need to know something, you'll know it.

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#7
We're not as complicated as you think we are, so stop trying to second guess our intentions.

Those of us who are practicing Catholics are more willing to sacrifice for you than you think we can for you and our future families.

You shouldn't test us because life is full of tests, so why push your luck?
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#8
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#9
(05-25-2014, 01:45 AM)Chestertonian Wrote: I know people generally like to think they're less shallow than they actually are, but I'd still say that looks are not #1 to me.  That being said most women pale in comparison to my wife so I don't really care about how most women look.

I'd say when it comes to assumptions women make about men, the one that bothers me the most is the stereotype that men only have "one thing" on our minds.  Yes, with the porn culture being what it is it might look that way.  And sure, men struggle with sexual purity in a different way than women do.  But I hate when men are reduced to sex crazed bundles of testosterone.  People pay attention to how women are seen as objects in our culture but many fail to see that men are stereotyped as objectifiers. 

I also wish women realized how much men often hate being asked the question, "What are you thinking?"  My wife has learned not to ask me this but my mother still asks me all the time.  If I had something to say, I would say it.  If I'm keeping something to myself, I have a good reason.  If you need to know something, you'll know it.

AND

(05-25-2014, 04:41 AM)LoneWolfRadTrad Wrote: We're not as complicated as you think we are, so stop trying to second guess our intentions.

Those of us who are practicing Catholics are more willing to sacrifice for you than you think we can for you and our future families.

You shouldn't test us because life is full of tests, so why push your luck?

:clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap:
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#10
(05-25-2014, 01:45 AM)Chestertonian Wrote: I also wish women realized how much men often hate being asked the question, "What are you thinking?"  My wife has learned not to ask me this but my mother still asks me all the time.  If I had something to say, I would say it.  If I'm keeping something to myself, I have a good reason.  If you need to know something, you'll know it.

I don't think I've ever asked a man that question.  I do hear it a lot, though, and you're right, it is annoying.
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