I need some feedback, please.
#1
I want to discuss this with a priest, and I know that the responses I'll get here will basically be speculation, but I would appreciate your feedback nonetheless.

Most of you know that I'm dealing with a very depressing and abusive situation at home with my parent. Communication with them is breaking down rapidly and we hardly speak to each other at all on the bad days, unless they get really mad and have a borderline, if not outright, tantrum. I'm waiting for a document to come in the mail that will allow me to re-enter Canada if I need to, for any reason.

Here's what it boils down to, though.

My boyfriend lives in New York. We've discussed the possibility of relocating to either Ontario or Quebec (I recommended Ontario as an option because Quebec is so French-centered at times and neither of us speak the language, at least not fluently) because I get concerned about the States' gun violence from time to time, but I love the country otherwise. He understandably wants to stay close to his family, so we focused on the two provinces that share a border with or are very close to New York.

He has offered to pay my way down to New York via a flight, and he is also fine with driving to pick me up and driving back because he knows I'm a bit weirded out about flying since I boarded a plane that had a flight malfunction (improperly functioning landing gear, resulting in bad, bad turbulence and an emergency turn-around to reboard on another plane).

If I were to get to him before the card comes in, or even after, and decided to stay with him, would that count as cohabitation? He lives with his mother, so we would not be living as husband as wife so much as roommates. We have both agreed not to have intercourse before marriage. We'd sleep in separate locations. I don't have the money for a separate living arrangement, and New York apartments are expensive. My boyfriend is going to try to get me set up with a work at home job that he works for, which pays well and gives us both the opportunity to look after his daughter. This will take a little while to get set up, though, so I won't be getting paychecks anytime soon.

Things are getting pretty bad over here and I really want to be with my boyfriend, and neither he nor I want to be in a cohabitation situation, because I'm Catholic and he was baptized Catholic and respects my commitments. Your feedback would be greatly appreciated. Thank you, guys.
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#2
Given the situation you describe, I don't see it as a moral issue.  There might be an occasion of temptation which you'll need to work to avoid, but we have to keep in mind that living together itself, i.e. sharing a roof, is not sinful so long as the risks of temptation are mitigated.  Only you and he can determine together (with spiritual direction from a priest ideally, as you mention desiring) whether you feel you can sufficiently avoid those temptations.
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#3
I have a similar opinion as Steven.

I would be more concerned if he lived alone, but because his mother is there it helps somewhat. (Not that living in your parents' home prevents anything...  Eye-roll) I agree that the situation itself isn't sinful per se, but the temptation might prove more than most people could bear, especially if you're sort-of living as a "family unit" by caring for his daughter. There's also the risk of scandal by mere perception. It can sometimes breed the attitude of, "everyone else already thinks I'm sleeping with him..."

It can be very dangerous going into that sort of situation because you're essentially fleeing your current home situation, and you're going to be co-habitating (even as room mates) for reasons of convenience. Those tend not to be super-well-thought-out plans, and you're running primarily on emotion (often desperation). Does he maybe have a sibling, cousin, friend, etc that you could board with instead? That might be a good compromise scenario, gets you out of the house but avoids the cohabitation issue.
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#4
"Does he maybe have a sibling, cousin, friend, etc that you could board with instead?"

I'm not sure. I do know that his mom is okay with me staying with them. Also, as bad as the situation can get here at my house, I don't want it to come across like I'm primarily leaving for that reason. It's difficult to be very far away from my boyfriend and I miss him a lot. When things get bad here, it exacerbates the feeling of missing him. So yes, wanting to get out of a bad home situation is part of it, but wanting to be with the man I love is the primary reason.

Thank you both very much for your feedback.
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