Confession help

[Chelsea5]

Is it possible to for one moment think that your confession could have been valid then the other moment not? Can that be a sign that a person did not intentionally try to keep out a sin? What are the examples of possible invalid confessions? Thanks alot :) lastly..is it possible to lie to your own self? And suppress thinking about a fault you did?

[In His Love]

It's so important that you get into a habit of refraining from asking these questions. Your scruples, I guarantee you, will come up with another set of questions for another situation. They won't heal until you ignore them, allow yourself to feel the uncomfortable feelings they bring up, and do absolutely nothing to entertain them: no "just to be sure" Confessions, no "was this a mortal/venial sin" questions, no "do I need to go back to Confession" questions, etc..

Your "maybe it was a valid Confession, maybe not" thoughts are a manifestation of scruples. An invalid Confession would be a sacrilegious one, where you purposefully, with the full consent of your will and knowing you were doing it, withheld a mortal sin in Confession. If you didn't do that (or even if you don't know; this shows a lack of full knowledge), accept Father's absolution (he's acting in the person of Christ, remember), and leave it at that.

Please read these:

https://littlestsouls.wordpress.com/2012...onfession/

https://littlestsouls.wordpress.com/2012...upulous-2/

Be at peace.

[Chelsea5]

Thank you very very much. Your post really made me feel better. You said exactly what I always do!
It's just that I still feel uncomfortable taking communion..
And I will read the links you sent.
My question is that, why do I feel like I'm lying to myself? When I examine my conscience.. It's such a pain to remember..like math.
So I'm not sure if I'm intentionally suppressing things, could it be possible?? Right now I still couldn't bring myself to think about what happened. Exactly what happened during the confession, I can't even think of it right now. I'm avoiding it I guess..

[VoxClamantis]

Thank you very very much. Your post really made me feel better. You said exactly what I always do!
It's just that I still feel uncomfortable taking communion..
And I will read the links you sent.
My question is that, why do I feel like I'm lying to myself? When I examine my conscience.. It's such a pain to remember..like math.
So I'm not sure if I'm intentionally suppressing things, could it be possible?? Right now I still couldn't bring myself to think about what happened. Exactly what happened during the confession, I can't even think of it right now. I'm avoiding it I guess..

Instead of doing a weekly or monthly or however-often-you-go-to-confession examination of conscience, do one nightly and write down your mortal sins. Then you won't have to think back and try to remember things.

If you don't KNOW if you're intentionally suppressing things, then you obviously aren't intentionally suppressing things. You can't do something with intention and not know it.

In His Love is giving you good advice. You have a case of the scruples, and you have it bad. You need to NIP it.

Some pages for you to get things straight in your head:

      http://www.fisheaters.com/moralthinking.html

      http://www.fisheaters.com/penance.html (see the page on "The 10 Commandments for the Scrupulous" linked to from there as well)

      http://www.fisheaters.com/conversionoftheheart.html

And repeat to yourself any time you have one of these nagging, scrupulous thoughts:

God isn't stupid, and He ISN'T OUT TO 'GET' ME!

Seriously, think about this: you'd have to think that God is a Big Fat Mean Jerk to think He'd send to Hell someone who forgot to confess a sin he'd otherwise be absolutely willing to confess, or someone who did something wrong but didn't know it was wrong, etc. Is that what you really think God is like? Even an average earthly father wouldn't be such a jerk as to punish a kid who was doing his best to remember a list of things but truly forgot something, or who did something wrong while not knowing it was wrong. You think GOD isn't better and more merciful and loving than the average Dad?

As to why you think you're lying to yourself, maybe you have OCD. Maybe you have a deep sense of shame over something (e.g., sexual abuse) you haven't dealt with. Maybe demons are trying to undermine your faith and exhaust you spiritually. Maybe you lack trust in God. Maybe you've been exposed to "Hellfire and brimstone" type preaching from certain Protestant or "toxic trad" types and have internalized it, leaving you with an image of God that's a cross between Henry VIII  and Stalin. Maybe something else altogether. Or maybe all of the above. That's something for you to talk to a therapist and/or spiritual director about. But what you must to do is to NOT let any of that keelhaul your peace of mind when it comes to trusting in God and His Sacraments.

Go to Mass, receive the sacraments, make use of sacramentals, refrain from sin as best as you can, repent when you stumble, pray, love God, love other people, live an intellectually and creatively-fulfilling life, and be at peace.