If you can spare the prayer
#1
Welp. 

I guess I finally should share this. I've been holding it back because I guess I didn't want to let it sink it, but today it did. My husband has let me know that he is not interested in being married to me if I join the Church. Our marriage was in a courthouse and never recognized by a Church so my Preist says this shouldn't be a hindrance to my Baptism or Confirmation. I kinda thought everything was okay until last Tuesday. He's not interested in working it out. It was a clear choice between him or the Church. 

I chose the Chruch, but I've not lived on my own since I was 23. Please, if you can spare some prayers I could really use them. I'm struggling a little with all of this, but I've bounced back from worse so I'm not in a terrible state. Just a bit down. Anyway. Yeah. That's happening :\ 

I'm not going to remarry. I've made that decision firmly. I'm also thinking about retiring early from my job (I'm in a position where I can afford to do so). There is a lot in flux at the moment for me, but at least I'm going to be gaining a very sound and firm foundation this Easter. 

If you can spare it, pray for me.
I am in the process of discerning my vocation with the help of my priest. If you would like to read my thoughts as I progress through this process of discernment feel free to visit my blog: https://walkingthelittleway.com
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#2
I will pray for you and your husband, for sure.

Do you know what his strong objections are to the Church?

Also, you mention that you are not baptised; was your husband unbaptised as well at the time of your marriage?  If so, something you could discuss with your priest is the Pauline privilege which allows the Church to dissolve a marriage between two non-Christians when one wishes to convert and the other does not wish to remain in the relationship.  This does not have to affect your decision to not remarry of course, but could potentially give your heart greater peace in single life.
"There are not over a hundred people in the United States who hate the Catholic Church. There are millions, however, who hate what they wrongly believe to be the Catholic Church -- which is, of course, quite a different thing." -Ven. Archbishop Fulton J. Sheen

"Let me repeat this sentence. It is impossible in human language to exaggerate the importance of being in a chapel or church before the Blessed Sacrament as often and for as long as our duties and state of life allow. That sentence is the talisman of the highest sanctity." -Fr. John Hardon, S.J.
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#3
He was not baptized either. His parents are extremely anti-religion. He's always been an atheist, but I never knew - even after a good 7 years of marriage - how staunchly he was an atheist. Also, he didn't find it important to bring this up as an issue to me until quite literally less than two weeks before baptism.

I'm hurt, a bit devastated to be honest...the timing feels very much a control issue (I think he thought there was no way I would go through with my baptism and confirmation if he sprung it on me so close to it happening), but I try not to judge others minds so who knows why. He moved out this weekend. It's been a very long weekend to say the least.

Sorry, rambling.

I didn't know about the Pauline privilege. I will certainly be bringing this up with my priest (I have been meeting with him weekly through this whole process). Thank you for passing that information along to me. I think that would be a good option look at the wiki, but I'd like to take some time to chat about it with my priest first. I mentioned it [the situation] to him after Mass this morning so I'm going in this evening to chat with him about it. He did let me know that it shouldn't keep me from entering the Church which was a huge relief. That was on my mind since I was told of my husband's decision.
I am in the process of discerning my vocation with the help of my priest. If you would like to read my thoughts as I progress through this process of discernment feel free to visit my blog: https://walkingthelittleway.com
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#4
Will pray for you.
"The days have gone down in the West, behind the hills, into shadow." - Theoden, King.
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#5
(03-12-2018, 12:01 PM)IntoTheMystic Wrote: Welp. 

I guess I finally should share this. I've been holding it back because I guess I didn't want to let it sink it, but today it did. My husband has let me know that he is not interested in being married to me if I join the Church. Our marriage was in a courthouse and never recognized by a Church so my Preist says this shouldn't be a hindrance to my Baptism or Confirmation. I kinda thought everything was okay until last Tuesday. He's not interested in working it out. It was a clear choice between him or the Church. 

I chose the Chruch, but I've not lived on my own since I was 23. Please, if you can spare some prayers I could really use them. I'm struggling a little with all of this, but I've bounced back from worse so I'm not in a terrible state. Just a bit down. Anyway. Yeah. That's happening :\ 

I'm not going to remarry. I've made that decision firmly. I'm also thinking about retiring early from my job (I'm in a position where I can afford to do so). There is a lot in flux at the moment for me, but at least I'm going to be gaining a very sound and firm foundation this Easter. 

If you can spare it, pray for me.
:heart: :pray2: Do you have children?  God bless, angeltime
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#6
(03-12-2018, 12:01 PM)IntoTheMystic Wrote: Welp. 

I guess I finally should share this. I've been holding it back because I guess I didn't want to let it sink it, but today it did. My husband has let me know that he is not interested in being married to me if I join the Church. Our marriage was in a courthouse and never recognized by a Church so my Preist says this shouldn't be a hindrance to my Baptism or Confirmation. I kinda thought everything was okay until last Tuesday. He's not interested in working it out. It was a clear choice between him or the Church. 

I chose the Chruch, but I've not lived on my own since I was 23. Please, if you can spare some prayers I could really use them. I'm struggling a little with all of this, but I've bounced back from worse so I'm not in a terrible state. Just a bit down. Anyway. Yeah. That's happening :\ 

I'm not going to remarry. I've made that decision firmly. I'm also thinking about retiring early from my job (I'm in a position where I can afford to do so). There is a lot in flux at the moment for me, but at least I'm going to be gaining a very sound and firm foundation this Easter. 

If you can spare it, pray for me.
Peace.....this is how God is calling you and it reminds me of several people I know, including myself that had dramatic conversions or returns to the Church and a price was paid - it can be painful, there can be losses.  Even within the Church are those various groups slightly or moreso against each other and one finds themself losing friends - this happens to those attending Tridentine Mass that have left Novus Ordo Mass.  I do have one Catholic friend married to an Athiest for several years and they have a library in their home.  On one side are all the Catholic books and on the other all the Athiest books.  They have managed to live like this and he does not stop her from attending Mass.  There is one priest she assists at times and her husband seems to be able to maintain a friendly civil conversation with him about many topics.  There is still tension in the marriage and home due to the difference.  It sounds as though you have the conviction and made up your mind - God bless, angeltime :heart:
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#7
(03-12-2018, 12:01 PM)IntoTheMystic Wrote: Welp. 

I guess I finally should share this. I've been holding it back because I guess I didn't want to let it sink it, but today it did. My husband has let me know that he is not interested in being married to me if I join the Church. Our marriage was in a courthouse and never recognized by a Church so my Preist says this shouldn't be a hindrance to my Baptism or Confirmation. I kinda thought everything was okay until last Tuesday. He's not interested in working it out. It was a clear choice between him or the Church. 

I chose the Chruch, but I've not lived on my own since I was 23. Please, if you can spare some prayers I could really use them. I'm struggling a little with all of this, but I've bounced back from worse so I'm not in a terrible state. Just a bit down. Anyway. Yeah. That's happening :\ 

I'm not going to remarry. I've made that decision firmly. I'm also thinking about retiring early from my job (I'm in a position where I can afford to do so). There is a lot in flux at the moment for me, but at least I'm going to be gaining a very sound and firm foundation this Easter. 

If you can spare it, pray for me.
"Go calmly in peace, for you have a good escort.  He who created you has sent the Holy Spirit who guards you as a mother does tenderly love her child.  Amen"  *St Clare of Assisi :heart:
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#8
Thank you for your encouragement angeltime <3

We do not have children. I was using birth control until I stopped 6 months ago [when I started to get my life in order to join the Church]. This has also been an extremely tense area of discussion in our home, and - in retrospect thankfully - we stopped being intimate because of it as he was not willing to 'risk it' as he said. So, no children now or expected coming either.

I had always thought he would be like your friend that you mention. We just wouldn't talk about it; however, for some reason, he recently became severely against my conversion. It was like night and day. His opinion changed almost from going to sleep and waking up one day. It was mind-boggling as he's always been rather calm about this type of thing. I've tried to talk to him, but he's already gotten the paperwork started. Apparently, he's been preparing for this big 'reveal' for a few weeks now. I just signed the paperwork this last weekend when he moved out.

Luckily, I had the foresight to get a prenuptual so I will retain ownership of my home and car. I've been considering early retirement from our company, and so after selling my ownership, I'll be blessed enough to be put in a financial situation to allow for adjustment. I agreed to his terms otherwise so this should be a rather painless procedure...or I guess relatively so. I'm over the shock at least, and the reality has already set in so now it's just a matter of dusting myself off and developing a new routine. Daily Mass has helped. It's a rock in a day filled with chaos.

It's been a week to say the least. I am very thankful for your prayers and kind words :) Sorry to vent/ramble at you.
I am in the process of discerning my vocation with the help of my priest. If you would like to read my thoughts as I progress through this process of discernment feel free to visit my blog: https://walkingthelittleway.com
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#9
Thank you for your prayers maldon <3 They are very much appreciated.
I am in the process of discerning my vocation with the help of my priest. If you would like to read my thoughts as I progress through this process of discernment feel free to visit my blog: https://walkingthelittleway.com
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#10
(03-12-2018, 05:51 PM)IntoTheMystic Wrote: Thank you for your encouragement angeltime <3

We do not have children. I was using birth control until I stopped 6 months ago [when I started to get my life in order to join the Church]. This has also been an extremely tense area of discussion in our home, and - in retrospect thankfully - we stopped being intimate because of it as he was not willing to 'risk it' as he said. So, no children now or expected coming either.

I had always thought he would be like your friend that you mention. We just wouldn't talk about it; however, for some reason, he recently became severely against my conversion. It was like night and day. His opinion changed almost from going to sleep and waking up one day. It was mind-boggling as he's always been rather calm about this type of thing. I've tried to talk to him, but he's already gotten the paperwork started. Apparently, he's been preparing for this big 'reveal' for a few weeks now. I just signed the paperwork this last weekend when he moved out.

Luckily, I had the foresight to get a prenuptual so I will retain ownership of my home and car. I've been considering early retirement from our company, and so after selling my ownership, I'll be blessed enough to be put in a financial situation to allow for adjustment. I agreed to his terms otherwise so this should be a rather painless procedure...or I guess relatively so. I'm over the shock at least, and the reality has already set in so now it's just a matter of dusting myself off and developing a new routine. Daily Mass has helped. It's a rock in a day filled with chaos.

It's been a week to say the least. I am very thankful for your prayers and kind words :) Sorry to vent/ramble at you.
Peace.....it's healthy and healing to share your experiences when painful or shocking.  This is obviously a major change in your life too!  It will be good to attend daily mass and have like-minded friends, especially Jesus.  God bless, angeltime :heart:
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