looking for celibate spouse LOL
#41
(03-18-2018, 01:24 PM)Daddy Wrote: A marriage with no sex is what they call "ratified but not consummated." It's analogous to agreeing to a legal arrangement but never actually signing the contract. I don't know whether or not a marrage can be legitimately ratified if there's a deliberate intent not to consummate.

The Blessed virgin was truly the wife of St. Joseph even though their marriage was never consumated.
Surréxit Dóminus vere, Alleluia!
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#42
(03-23-2018, 08:44 PM)Dominicus Wrote: The Blessed virgin was truly the wife of St. Joseph even though their marriage was never consumated.

And St Edward the Confessor and his queen, Edith, as I've pointed out.
Jovan-Marya of the Immaculate Conception Weismiller, T.O.Carm.

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Deum timete, regem honorificate.
Kansan by birth! Albertan by choice! Jayhawk by the Grace of God!
  “Qui me amat, amet et canem meum. (Who loves me will love my dog also.)” 
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My Blog 'Musings of an Old Curmudgeon'


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#43
Well the thing is that while Josephite marriages do exist, they are very unusual circumstances. What exactly are your reasons for wanting to remain continent and yet married? (Celibate means unmarried) If this desire results from inpotency then it may not be possible to marry depending on the circumstances.

Have you spoken to a spiritual director? Have you considered religious life, consecrated virginity, or simply remaining single?
Surréxit Dóminus vere, Alleluia!
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#44
(03-23-2018, 12:41 PM)gracemary5 Wrote: no response

OMG! I am so shocked

It seems nowadays, if you don't want sex, you are seen as a total freak
You don't seem to know very much about men. You should learn more first.
There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy.
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#45
(03-23-2018, 08:44 PM)Dominicus Wrote: The Blessed virgin was truly the wife of St. Joseph even though their marriage was never consumated.


Unless something changed in the intervening centuries, it wasn't binding. It could have been dissolved.
There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy.
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#46
(03-24-2018, 05:44 AM)Daddy Wrote: Unless something changed in the intervening centuries, it wasn't binding. It could have been dissolved.

Some links discussing Josephite Marriage.

From Catholic Exchange

From Catholic Life:


Quote:But what about the fact that the Pope can dissolve unconsummated marriages, even if he does not do so? The whole point is that dissolution is necessary to free spouses from marriage because the marriage is valid, even though not consummated. If that were not the case then they could simply get a decree of nullity.

From Ethelreda's Place
Jovan-Marya of the Immaculate Conception Weismiller, T.O.Carm.

Vive le Christ-roi! Vive le roi, Louis XX!
Deum timete, regem honorificate.
Kansan by birth! Albertan by choice! Jayhawk by the Grace of God!
  “Qui me amat, amet et canem meum. (Who loves me will love my dog also.)” 
St Bernard of Clairvaux

My Blog 'Musings of an Old Curmudgeon'


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#47
"The whole point is that dissolution is necessary to free spouses from marriage because the marriage is valid, even though not consummated. If that were not the case then they could simply get a decree of nullity."

That's all I said. Unlike the priesthood or a consummated marriage, it's not permanent. A priest is a priest till death regardless of what happens. A man and woman with a consummated marriage are husband and wife till death regardless of what happens. A ratified marriage however can end and they are really and truly no longer husband and wife. So what is it? I don't know. I'm not denying it's existence. Can a man have multiple wives as long as he only consummates his first marriage? He wouldn't be committing adultery and what's the difference between a man and woman vowing to live together like brother and sister and calling it marriage or not calling it marriage especially when it can be dissolved?
There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy.
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#48
(03-14-2018, 09:59 PM)Imperator Caesar Trump Wrote: A few seconds in google indicated to me that a couple can be married and not consummate the marriage, but that marriage is actually dissoluble.  

gracemary, have you sought any spiritual direction regarding your vocation?  My thought is that your peculiar concept of what you want out of a marriage should be nudging you toward seeking guidance about what God is calling you to do.  I know many men who want to have sex and be priests, but your situation is the polar opposite in that you want to be celibate and married.  I think a trusted priest would be a great person to talk to, and then once you figure things out, come back and start hunting for a man.  

That's just my thought.

well, this was a lovely walk in the park post

i have been to what i thought was a good priest... OK, he is a good one but he doesn't seem to want to talk to me about my vocational pursuits--or ANYTHING

i don't know... maybe he is attracted to me? LOL and doesn't want to become more so? or maybe that is wishful thinking or something, but no, it is not that because i am really not overly attracted to anyone these days. I tried to enter a convent but... well, maybe you have a clue RE how the Church is these days.. I frankly think the convents don't want practicing Catholics. Go figure

riddle me this
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#49
(03-25-2018, 03:25 PM)Daddy Wrote: "The whole point is that dissolution is necessary to free spouses from marriage because the marriage is valid, even though not consummated. If that were not the case then they could simply get a decree of nullity."

That's all I said. Unlike the priesthood or a consummated marriage, it's not permanent. A priest is a priest till death regardless of what happens. A man and woman with a consummated marriage are husband and wife till death regardless of what happens. A ratified marriage however can end and they are really and truly no longer husband and wife. So what is it? I don't know. I'm not denying it's existence. Can a man have multiple wives as long as he only consummates his first marriage? He wouldn't be committing adultery and what's the difference between a man and woman vowing to live together like brother and sister and calling it marriage or not calling it marriage especially when it can be dissolved?

well, this is interesting

I know I have often been attracted to someone married and of course, can't go there but what if i were one of his many wives so called who are platonic?

there certainly would (probably ) never be any temptation on my part, to be sure. But i guess some would say that is playing w/ fire (soemtimes men like women who aren't attracted to them romantically. Go figure)

and yet there are more men in the world than women.. and.. i sometimes desire the company of ..certain interesting men, just don't want to go the romance route.
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#50
(03-23-2018, 12:41 PM)gracemary5 Wrote: It seems nowadays, if you don't want sex, you are seen as a total freak

You are not a total freak.

While your requirement may be unconventional; I do not see it as unreasonable.

I have had dreams/meditations along these lines before. What was it like for St Joseph? Or our Blessed Mother?
While I can't site any sources, I would imagine that there have been couples practicing this arrangement throughout church history.

Good Luck and keep praying.
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