Relationships in Heaven
#1
Hi guys,

I've fallen in love with this married woman in my parish and I've been struggling with this passion for a couple months. I make sure I avoid her at all costs but it's a really hard cross to bear because she's so beautiful both physically and certainly spiritually, she goes to mass everyday and I'm confident she loves me too which makes the cross even more painful. I don't think her husband loves her very much considering the fact that he attends mass very infrequently and that how much we love God corresponds with how much we'll love our neighbor. This absolutely breaks my heart. I wanted to know if anyone had insights to what relations in Heaven will be like so I can have some comfort and something to hope for because I really want to know this lady but obviously we can not have a deep relationship here on Earth and I don't want to interact with her because that can lead to serious sin.

Thanks
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#2
(04-30-2018, 03:16 PM)Patmappas28 Wrote: Hi guys,

I've fallen in love with this married woman in my parish and I've been struggling with this passion for a couple months. I make sure I avoid her at all costs but it's a really hard cross to bear because she's so beautiful both physically and certainly spiritually, she goes to mass everyday and I'm confident she loves me too which makes the cross even more painful. I don't think her husband loves her very much considering the fact that he attends mass very infrequently and that how much we love God corresponds with how much we'll love our neighbor. This absolutely breaks my heart. I wanted to know if anyone had insights to what relations in Heaven will be like so I can have some comfort and something to hope for because I really want to know this lady but obviously we can not have a deep relationship here on Earth and I don't want to interact with her because that can lead to serious sin.

Thanks

Peace.....well, first the fact that her husband is not at Mass with her frequently could be her Cross and she is praying about it - so that is what God has put on her plate.  She seems to be carrying whatever quite well by attending daily Mass.  You are doing the right thing by respecting her and her marriage, to stay out of it which has become your Cross and temptation.  The devil would love it if you all gave up on the deeper meanings and made a mess of things - possibly breaking up a marriage and then possibly losing some souls in the process.  As for Heaven - there is no marriage because there is a state of perfection - perfect harmony, unity, love, peace - all the physical needs are gone!  We can't even order a pizza.  God bless, angeltime :heart:
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#3
(04-30-2018, 03:16 PM)Patmappas28 Wrote: Hi guys,

I've fallen in love with this married woman in my parish and I've been struggling with this passion for a couple months. I make sure I avoid her at all costs but it's a really hard cross to bear because she's so beautiful both physically and certainly spiritually, she goes to mass everyday and I'm confident she loves me too which makes the cross even more painful. I don't think her husband loves her very much considering the fact that he attends mass very infrequently and that how much we love God corresponds with how much we'll love our neighbor. This absolutely breaks my heart. I wanted to know if anyone had insights to what relations in Heaven will be like so I can have some comfort and something to hope for because I really want to know this lady but obviously we can not have a deep relationship here on Earth and I don't want to interact with her because that can lead to serious sin.

Thanks

Ok...right there, stop!  Stay far away from that situation.  When you run to a woman's arms who is not your spouse, you are running to the arms of the devil.  I'm not saying be mean to her, but keep her at a considerable distance.

The souls in heaven exist in perfect friendship, and perfect holiness, and they neither marry nor are given in marriage.
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#4
(04-30-2018, 03:16 PM)Patmappas28 Wrote: Hi guys,

I've fallen in love with this married woman in my parish and I've been struggling with this passion for a couple months. I make sure I avoid her at all costs but it's a really hard cross to bear because she's so beautiful both physically and certainly spiritually, she goes to mass everyday and I'm confident she loves me too which makes the cross even more painful. I don't think her husband loves her very much considering the fact that he attends mass very infrequently and that how much we love God corresponds with how much we'll love our neighbor. This absolutely breaks my heart. I wanted to know if anyone had insights to what relations in Heaven will be like so I can have some comfort and something to hope for because I really want to know this lady but obviously we can not have a deep relationship here on Earth and I don't want to interact with her because that can lead to serious sin.

Thanks

Well, first, I am sorry that your affections are attached to this woman.  If it is any consolation to you, they will pass like most feelings and affections do.  Don't place too much emphasis on them and don't freak out over them.  Your feelings and sentiments are not really determined by you, but you do control how you respond to them, so while you are "in love" with this woman, just do your best to ignore it, and pray God it dissipates.  I am engaged to be married, and from personal experience I will let you know that this sort of thing happens from time to time.  It is just emotion, and at worst it is lust.  Don't worry about how you feel, worry about doing the right thing.  You have no business with another man's wife.

Second, avoid her at all costs, especially if she seems to have the same sentiments towards you.  If you are both active in your parish, and have roles that bring you into frequent contact, keep a cool and distant relationship, be professional.  Not uncharitable, but don't get too familiar.  She seems pious and devout, so leave her that way.  Pray for her husband so she can have a happier marriage.  If you truly, really do love her, that is have charity for her and desire what is best for her, then pray that God will convert her husband and bring them closer.  Anything else, trying to lead her away from her husband, trying to "save" her from him, etc. is just evil and selfish.  

Third, if you both make it to Heaven, pray God that it be, then you will both be perfectly and completely happy, regardless of the other, because God is the central focus of Heaven, indeed, Heaven is looking upon His pure glory and beauty.  So, you will love one another purely and perfectly, and you will revel and delight in the pure, eternal and everlasting love of God. 

Hope this helps.
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#5
I forget which saint said it, but describing how to protect religious men and women in their chastity it was said : "Between two holy souls should be a wall of brick and mortar."

She may be the holiest woman in the world, but that is insufficient to protect you.

She is married. Her vocation in life is determined. It is not with you. Thus, it is not God's Will.

If it is not God's Will it will not make you happy, and trying to pursue it can only make you miserable, perhaps eternally.

Leave it.
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#6
(04-30-2018, 03:42 PM)angeltime Wrote:
(04-30-2018, 03:16 PM)Patmappas28 Wrote: Hi guys,

I've fallen in love with this married woman in my parish and I've been struggling with this passion for a couple months. I make sure I avoid her at all costs but it's a really hard cross to bear because she's so beautiful both physically and certainly spiritually, she goes to mass everyday and I'm confident she loves me too which makes the cross even more painful. I don't think her husband loves her very much considering the fact that he attends mass very infrequently and that how much we love God corresponds with how much we'll love our neighbor. This absolutely breaks my heart. I wanted to know if anyone had insights to what relations in Heaven will be like so I can have some comfort and something to hope for because I really want to know this lady but obviously we can not have a deep relationship here on Earth and I don't want to interact with her because that can lead to serious sin.

Thanks

We can't even order a pizza.  God bless, angeltime :heart:

that's funny, i like that lol
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#7
(04-30-2018, 03:16 PM)Patmappas28 Wrote: I don't think her husband loves her very much considering the fact that he attends mass very infrequently ...

Are you talking about daily Mass here? Maybe he's too busy being a man and working hard to put food on the table and a roof over his family's heads. Hm?
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