The Answer Re. Bears and the Pope
#1
The answer to the two great questions about where bears do their thing and whether the Pope's Catholic:


     What do you get when you cross Pope Francis with a bear?

     An Episcopalian bear who does his business all over the Church.


Bad or funny or both?
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#2
It needs some work, but it definitely has possibilities! LOL
Jovan-Marya of the Immaculate Conception Weismiller, T.O.Carm.

Vive le Christ-roi! Vive le roi, Louis XX!
Deum timete, regem honorificate.
Kansan by birth! Albertan by choice! Jayhawk by the Grace of God!
  “Qui me amat, amet et canem meum. (Who loves me will love my dog also.)” 
St Bernard of Clairvaux

My Blog 'Musings of an Old Curmudgeon'


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#3
What do you get when you cross a polar bear, Pope F, and a harp?

A bear faced liar.
-sent by howitzer via the breech.

God's love is manifest in the landscape as in a face.  - John Muir

I want creation to penetrate you with so much admiration that wherever you go, the least plant may bring you clear remembrance of the Creator.  A single plant, a blade of grass, or one speck of dust is sufficient to occupy all your intelligence in beholding the art with which it has been made  - Saint Basil

Heaven is under our feet, as well as over our heads. - Thoreau, Walden
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#4
(08-10-2018, 01:44 PM)Jeeter Wrote: What do you get when you cross a polar bear, Pope F, and a harp?

A bear faced liar.

Now that's good! LOL
Jovan-Marya of the Immaculate Conception Weismiller, T.O.Carm.

Vive le Christ-roi! Vive le roi, Louis XX!
Deum timete, regem honorificate.
Kansan by birth! Albertan by choice! Jayhawk by the Grace of God!
  “Qui me amat, amet et canem meum. (Who loves me will love my dog also.)” 
St Bernard of Clairvaux

My Blog 'Musings of an Old Curmudgeon'


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#5
(08-10-2018, 01:50 PM)jovan66102 Wrote: Now that's good! LOL

Thanks.

Since Pope Benedict XVI is Bavarian, as the head of the Church would he have been a German Shepherd? Big Grin
-sent by howitzer via the breech.

God's love is manifest in the landscape as in a face.  - John Muir

I want creation to penetrate you with so much admiration that wherever you go, the least plant may bring you clear remembrance of the Creator.  A single plant, a blade of grass, or one speck of dust is sufficient to occupy all your intelligence in beholding the art with which it has been made  - Saint Basil

Heaven is under our feet, as well as over our heads. - Thoreau, Walden
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#6
(08-10-2018, 02:11 PM)Jeeter Wrote: Since Pope Benedict XVI is Bavarian, as the head of the Church would he have been a German Shepherd? Big Grin

Well, a lot of people called him 'God's Rottweiler'.
Jovan-Marya of the Immaculate Conception Weismiller, T.O.Carm.

Vive le Christ-roi! Vive le roi, Louis XX!
Deum timete, regem honorificate.
Kansan by birth! Albertan by choice! Jayhawk by the Grace of God!
  “Qui me amat, amet et canem meum. (Who loves me will love my dog also.)” 
St Bernard of Clairvaux

My Blog 'Musings of an Old Curmudgeon'


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#7
(08-10-2018, 02:39 PM)jovan66102 Wrote:
(08-10-2018, 02:11 PM)Jeeter Wrote: Since Pope Benedict XVI is Bavarian, as the head of the Church would he have been a German Shepherd? Big Grin

Well, a lot of people called him 'God's Rottweiler'.

A rottweiler that doesn't know whether to bark or whimper. If he's "God's Rottweiler", perhaps we should give Him an Alsatian next time.
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#8
Benedict XVI, more of a pussycat, really. 

Always sayin' stuff ~

We must not allow a blasé enlightenment that immediately brands the zeal of those seized by the Holy Spirit, and their naïve faith in God’s Word, with the anathema of fundamentalism


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#9
(08-10-2018, 01:28 PM)jovan66102 Wrote: It needs some work, but it definitely has possibilities! LOL

It's in the telling, I think. You have to slip it in sideways after setting it up, and you have to use the word "sh**" for it to be funny.  Ya know -- 

"Blah blah, etc." followed by, in passing, when relevant (key), "eh, does a bear shit in the woods? Is the Pope Catholic? Ha, on second thought, you cross that bear and Francis, you get an Episcopalian bear who shits all over the Church." Badum-tssss. Then it would work. See?
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#10
(08-11-2018, 11:15 AM)VoxClamantis Wrote:
(08-10-2018, 01:28 PM)jovan66102 Wrote: It needs some work, but it definitely has possibilities! LOL

It's in the telling, I think. You have to slip it in sideways after setting it up, and you have to use the word "sh**" for it to be funny.  Ya know -- 

"Blah blah, etc." followed by, in passing, when relevant (key), "eh, does a bear shit in the woods? Is the Pope Catholic? Ha, on second thought, you cross that bear and Francis, you get an Episcopalian bear who shits all over the Church." Badum-tssss. Then it would work. See?

At a recent mass in St Peters Basilica, it is reported that a Bear was in attendance, by coincidence it happened to be sitting next to a Russian Orthodox Priest.  Pope Francis noticed this as he was giving his homily, and was inspired to ad-lib his theme to speak to the need for unity and dialogue between Rome and the Orthodox. After the Mass, the pope stayed and met with some of the congregation, hoping to understand how a bear would come to be at his mass.  All of a sudden the bear approached and said, “Salve, Papa Francisco”.  The Pope was slightly startled and asked incredulously, “You’re Roman Catholic”?  The Bear replied “ Yes, all members of the Ursus Arctos genus are traditionally Roman Rite, and as a rule we are known to prefer the Traditional Latin sung mass”. The Pope was amazed, admitting that he was not aware of this, but noting “well, it’s not like we get a lot of bears visiting the Vatican, your actually the first bear I can ever recall seeing at a mass I was celebrating”.  The bear just shrugged his shoulders and said “well, with all that ecumenism crap about unity and dialogue with the Orthodox, I can see why!”


 
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"Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?" On hearing this, Jesus said, "It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. But go and learn what this means: 'I desire mercy, not sacrifice.' For I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners."  Matthew 9:10-14
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