Need some help
#11
(08-22-2018, 11:27 PM)Sacred Heart lover Wrote: Thomas doubted and he had been walking around with Christ (God himself!) for 3 years!

Ignatius doubted. Xavier doubted. 

I can't think of others at the moment, but so many had been taught the faith yet doubted anyway.

They overcame it through study, prayer and the sacraments.

Conversion is a continual process.

So persevere! :)

This is something I was given 25 years ago and have to read once a year to keep going in life.

It helps me to understand everything including how a loving God can let such bad things happen.

St. Coumbiere went into England to serve Catholics in secret and was thrown in jail where he wrote this.  Why would God allow that to happen when he was trying to do something so good and necessary?

Well, read.  It's online for free.

http://www.saintsbooks.net/books/Fr.%20J...idence.pdf

 I appreciate that St.Coumbiere quote, that is pretty much how I feel about my life in some aspects,   i have a short attention span for reading religious articles but i did skim an managed to hit upon the Trials and Punishments part of that  article, and found it interesting... I feel there is truth to it being played out in my life.  An i can see where I lack, is being able to accept it with out complaining.  And I need to work on more, I am very aware of when I complain and how and who I complain too... I try very hard to not complain to my family about my problems, because it is sad for them, and i dont want to bring them down or have them struggling as I am. It is enough that I have to go throug what i go through why bring others into it, or at least my family. Especially when they have their own problems, but more over, how do I do work on not resenting them to a degree.

An probably the answer is some where in the mix of prayer and realizing that I have to accept that being human has it's limitations.

  I am coming to terms with my disabilities, having to acknowledge they are real... that I need real help. which i am seeking and in the process of obtaining.   and it comes with having to acknowledge an accept that I am entering into poverty. Which is a perspective thing that I read from another article posted on my thread here, perspective that is.   One can live in poverty and be content. Poverty is not necesarily a bad or good. it just is.  I am financially unstable ,and financially poor, but in other aspects for the time being i have security.
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#12
(08-23-2018, 03:32 AM)originalscreenname Wrote:  I appreciate that St.Coumbiere quote, that is pretty much how I feel about my life in some aspects,   i have a short attention span for reading religious articles but i did skim an managed to hit upon the Trials and Punishments part of that  article, and found it interesting... I feel there is truth to it being played out in my life.  An i can see where I lack, is being able to accept it with out complaining.  And I need to work on more, I am very aware of when I complain and how and who I complain too... I try very hard to not complain to my family about my problems, because it is sad for them, and i dont want to bring them down or have them struggling as I am. It is enough that I have to go throug what i go through why bring others into it, or at least my family. Especially when they have their own problems, but more over, how do I do work on not resenting them to a degree.

An probably the answer is some where in the mix of prayer and realizing that I have to accept that being human has it's limitations.

  I am coming to terms with my disabilities, having to acknowledge they are real... that I need real help. which i am seeking and in the process of obtaining.   and it comes with having to acknowledge an accept that I am entering into poverty. Which is a perspective thing that I read from another article posted on my thread here, perspective that is.   One can live in poverty and be content. Poverty is not necesarily a bad or good. it just is.  I am financially unstable ,and financially poor, but in other aspects for the time being i have security.

I can't read for very long either because the words appear to move around due to a neuro disease.  Now I'm having my son read it to me.  It's a good one to just read one little section each day to mull over.  My life would make no sense at all without it.

Yes, so basically I see God as our personal trainer.  You don't want a personal trainer who will feed you donuts and tell you that two reps is enough for today. LOL :)

No, he will push us so we can grow in virtues such as detachment, humility, fortitude, mercy, etc.

The goal is to become like Him.

I am disabled as well and have been abused.  The only way I can cope is (after feeling angry or frustrated) to finally say, "Thank you.  I don't know why you have allowed this to happen but thank you, because I trust in you."  Then I start to feel some consolation.  It's acceptance, which is the final stage of grief.

The knowledge that I can actually help to save souls whom I will meet one day in Heaven is what makes suffering worthwhile.  Uniting my suffering to Jesus cross, or crown of thorns, or scourging, for the very people who hurt me in the same way He offered it for me when I hurt Him,  helps it all make sense somehow.  

Here are some short (under 5min) trailers/clips of movies that helped me to grow in contentment:

Happy Movie






I love how this guy describes his home :)






This is another one about a guy who moved to India to help children with aids:





The full movies cost about $3 and are worth watching.

So yeah, gratitude for every little thing goes a long way.  We have such high expectations and all the commercials and movies/tv hypes that to the extreme.  

In reality, we have sooooo much more than most people in the world.  Thank you, God, for clean sheets.  Thank you for that box of toilet paper Amazon just delivered.  Thank you for clean water to bathe in.  Thank you for enough food for today.

Then looking for little ways to make others have a better day or life.  Just a smile or a joke even.

Like the rosary which highlights the mysteries of the lives of Jesus and Mary, our lives have joyful, glorious and sorrowful mysteries.  The sorrowful mysteries are stepping stones and God uses them to bring out good things in our lives if we cooperate with Him.  

God bless!
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#13
{Like the rosary which highlights the mysteries of the lives of Jesus and Mary, our lives have joyful, glorious and sorrowful mysteries. The sorrowful mysteries are stepping stones and God uses them to bring out good things in our lives if we cooperate with Him.}

I found this comment interesting in that my time for Adoration is Tuesday nights from 11pm-12am and that is when I pray the Rosary the Sorrowful Mysteries. An with my particular adoration I guess chapel, it use to be a " cry room " the silence in there is painful, I don't know if the room is sound proof, maybe it is , maybe being sound proof has nothing to do with anything, but my ears just start busting out a painful tone , like if you hit a tuning fork and it doesn't stop. It is so bad that I had to bring a little walkman in to use as back ground noise an the ear buds make it possible to listen at a reasonable level where no one else can hear it.

And the interesting with needing to cooperate to accept the good... like being given a gift wrapped present and not opening it... I don't have much joy in life anymore.. there are a few things that bring me peace and joy, and I am thankful for that..I feel like I am at the point in life where I just don't know what I want any more. I really think I am in some state of purgatory. a state of constant sorrow and hope. but at least here i get the chance of getting a break from it all now and then.
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#14
Yes, you sound quite numb.  I was like that for a very long time.

I had lived in an unsafe environment for so many years, it took several years to accept that I was now in a safe enough environment to relax a bit.

But of course we are never completely safe and my next breath may be my last.  Therefore the necessity of trustful surrender to divine providence.

A priest had me buy a notebook and divide it into three categories.  Joyful, Sorrowful and Glorius.

Then during my prayer time I was to take 5 min and allow memories of my life to come to mind and jot them down in a phrase of only a couple words according to their category.  Birth of my child--Joyful  Miscarriage--Sorrowful  First Communion--Glorious  etc.

Then after about of month of categorizing all the major and small events of my life I was to go back through the Joyful and Glorious and as I read the list to give great thanks to God.  Keep adding to this list everyday and throughout the day to yourself.

Then the Sorrowful.  This is where people get stuck he said.  So I was to go through and write next to each sorrowful mystery of my life something good that came out of it.  Abuse--made me a better parent.  Rejecton by that friend--humility  Betrayal by husband--become more Christlike  It's really amazing how there is always something good you can find when you put your mind to it.

The next step is to forgive those who have hurt me.  You spend time meditating on just one painful event and ask Jesus to be in the room with you as you experience it again in your mind.  You ask Him to help you want to forgive. You ask him for the grace to forgive.  Then you tell the person you forgive them.  You look to Jesus and for confirmation that you forgave and see if he nods "yes" or "no".  If no, then you repeat the process.

So the process takes several months and reoriented my whole perception of my life in unity with Christ and His life.
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#15
(08-24-2018, 09:38 PM)Sacred Heart lover Wrote: Yes, you sound quite numb.  I was like that for a very long time.

I had lived in an unsafe environment for so many years, it took several years to accept that I was now in a safe enough environment to relax a bit.

But of course we are never completely safe and my next breath may be my last.  Therefore the necessity of trustful surrender to divine providence.

A priest had me buy a notebook and divide it into three categories.  Joyful, Sorrowful and Glorius.

Then during my prayer time I was to take 5 min and allow memories of my life to come to mind and jot them down in a phrase of only a couple words according to their category.  Birth of my child--Joyful  Miscarriage--Sorrowful  First Communion--Glorious  etc.

Then after about of month of categorizing all the major and small events of my life I was to go back through the Joyful and Glorious and as I read the list to give great thanks to God.  Keep adding to this list everyday and throughout the day to yourself.

Then the Sorrowful.  This is where people get stuck he said.  So I was to go through and write next to each sorrowful mystery of my life something good that came out of it.  Abuse--made me a better parent.  Rejecton by that friend--humility  Betrayal by husband--become more Christlike  It's really amazing how there is always something good you can find when you put your mind to it.

The next step is to forgive those who have hurt me.  You spend time meditating on just one painful event and ask Jesus to be in the room with you as you experience it again in your mind.  You ask Him to help you want to forgive. You ask him for the grace to forgive.  Then you tell the person you forgive them.  You look to Jesus and for confirmation that you forgave and see if he nods "yes" or "no".  If no, then you repeat the process.

So the process takes several months and reoriented my whole perception of my life in unity with Christ and His life.

Thank you  for sharing this, I think I will give this a try during my time in adoration... I can see how the challenge is for the Sorrow part of life... Turning a negative into a positve or finding the positive is hard...  I think though if I were to sum up very quickly the one postive that came out of the sorrow or bad times of my life is the ability to persevere .. The forgiveness part is very interesting... does someone need to ask to be forgiven in the first place, or  is forgiving someone who doesnt want to be forgiven, doesn't care, wouldn't even change their ways one bit even if they knew one has forgiven them,  is the person forgiving that person only to let go of the pain and if so is that selfish or is it a forgiveness to not only let go of the pain but for possible betterment of the one who has hurt us with the hope that they will turn to Christ/ God / the Church... Then , what if someone doesn't deserve to be forgiven for what they have done to us ? I believe that is an honest possiblity too... and maybe a reason for the saying that forgiveness is divine.  Another thing is just because we forgive someone doesn't mean that we have to like or be friends with that person.

What is one supposed to do if one doesn't want to forgive someone. Or just for what ever reason is unable too.?
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#16
:heart: Peace.....sometimes we have to repeatedly put into our prayers - I forgive, I forgive until it takes root in us.  There was a saint (nun) who did this everyday for a long time until she felt healed from her unforgiveness.  It can take time, because even though we go to confession are are absolved, we still physically and emotionally carry the pain for a long time.  Don't give up!  God bless, angeltime :heart:
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#17
Hi again folks, so I have been mulling this next question over off and on, and it isn't detrimental to my faith wouldnt change one thing left or right, but i find it intriguing. An that is the topic of Jesus and having Mary Magdalene as a " girlfriend " . I don't really know how that got started, I assume some where, someone wrote something down that may have suggested that there was some kind of feelings being expressed to some degree that was interpreted as romance.

What I don't get is, why the push back ? Why is this considered nonsense this idea that it is even a possibility ? Because for me I see the church constantly pushing family values, marriage is for heterosexuals, and that is all good and correct. But what does bother me is that when it comes to Jesus and his disciples and the women in their lives and the relationship with those women ( excluding their family ) there is this empty void. We are told Jesus is human and divine, that he was tempted and suffered just like us, but we are to some how believe he didn't have human feelings for a woman ? Ever ? An good grief we are expected to believe that if Jesus ever in his life time kissed a female in a loving way one kisses his girlfriend that he is either in love with or dating, that some how the world would come to an end ? Or that everything Jesus ever did would some how be corrupted ?

It seems to me that the Church would want to emphasis a relationship like that to bolster that relationships are meant to be heterosexual in nature. OR at the very least, at least be open to the possibility that he could have had an interest in a woman at some point in his life, and had to choose which path to go down. I think the problem or fear is that people want to twist that into Jesus had a sexual relationship and created a blood line, and I can see how that would cause a struggle... BUT even if that was the case , say in a hypothetical universe it happened Jesus had a girlfriend and eventually at some point had a child. How does that not enforce the sacred bond of marriage and boost the cause for the sanctity of marriage ? Because even in this hypothetical sense, the church could still put an asterix next to such a case and say, we have writtings that something may have happened, we dont know for certain and it doesnt change the fact that Jesus is the Son of God and died for us.

More over, we are to believe that we become adopted brothers and sisters in Christ, but again, Jesus having a girlfriend or even a child, is for some reason insane ? Personally I dont believe he had a child, It is bad enough that the Blessed Mother and the disciples had to witness his death and the fear and doubt it put on the disciples , but to have to worry about leaving behind a child, and or wife / would really be a painful experience on both sides of the equation for Jesus and whom ever. But having just a " girlfriend " and having a non sexual relationship is what we are expected to do before marriage so why wouldn't Jesus have done the same ?

I can't honestly find a lot of reasons why this is something scandalous , blasphemous, or evil in disguise , with saying it is possible but there just is no facts to state for sure.
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#18
(08-28-2018, 11:44 AM)originalscreenname Wrote: Hi again folks, so  I have been mulling this next question over off and on, and it isn't detrimental to my faith wouldnt change one thing left or right, but i find it intriguing. An that is the topic of Jesus and having Mary Magdalene as a " girlfriend " .     I don't really know how that got started, I assume some where, someone wrote something down that may have suggested that there was some kind of feelings being expressed to some degree that was interpreted as romance.

What I don't get is, why the push back ? Why is this considered nonsense this idea that it is even a possibility ? Because for me I see the church constantly pushing family values, marriage is for heterosexuals, and that is all good and correct. But what does bother me is that when it comes to Jesus and his disciples and the women in their lives and the relationship with those women ( excluding their family ) there is this empty void. We are told Jesus is human and divine, that he was tempted and suffered just like us, but we are to some how believe he didn't have human feelings for a woman ? Ever ? An good grief we are expected to believe that if Jesus ever in his life time kissed a female in a loving way one kisses his girlfriend that he is either in love with or dating, that some how the world would come to an end ? Or that everything Jesus ever did would some how be corrupted ?

It seems to me that the Church would want to emphasis a relationship like that to bolster that relationships are meant to be heterosexual in nature. OR at the very least, at least be open to the possibility that he could have had an interest in a woman at some point in his life, and had to choose which path to go down.  I think the problem or fear is that people want to twist that into Jesus had a sexual relationship and created a blood line, and I can see how that would cause a struggle... BUT even if that was the case , say in a hypothetical universe it happened Jesus had a girlfriend and  eventually at some point had a child. How does that not enforce the sacred bond of marriage and boost the cause for the sanctity of marriage ? Because even in this hypothetical sense, the church could still put an asterix next to such a case and say, we have writtings that something may have happened, we dont know for certain and it doesnt change the fact that Jesus is the Son of God and died for us.  

More over, we are to believe that we become adopted brothers and sisters in Christ, but again, Jesus having a girlfriend or even a child, is for some reason insane ?  Personally I dont believe he had a child, It is bad enough that the Blessed Mother and the disciples had to witness his death and the fear and doubt it put on the disciples ,  but to have to worry about leaving behind a child, and or wife  / would really be a painful experience on both sides of the equation for Jesus and whom ever.  But having just a " girlfriend "  and having a non sexual relationship is what we are expected to do before marriage so why wouldn't Jesus have done the same ?  

I can't honestly find a lot of reasons why this is something scandalous , blasphemous, or evil in disguise , with saying it is possible but there just is no facts to state for sure.
Peace.....exactly - there is nothing written down to support that Jesus had a girlfriend or a personal romantic relationship.  In the 33 yrs he spent on earth, he was constantly concerned about doing his Father's business (as He said in Scripture) - this was His mission on earth and He knew it - at a very early age and most likely prior to that.
If I remember the time when talk came out about Jesus and Mary Magd having a relationship, there was also talk that Jesus was homosexual and in my opinion both groups were trying to minimize Jesus' mission and divine nature.  God bless, angeltime :heart:
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#19
Thank you for the reply Angel,  I didnt consider that there may have been a reason for this idea of Mary Magdalene being a girlfriend of sorts.   I do agree that Jesus knew he had a mission and stuck with it,  but again, is there really anything wrong, immoral, blasphemous, etc with just the idea that Jesus could have had a girlfriend at some point in his life ? Practically speaking it may not have made sense for him too, ( i hate using the word but so many times ) BUT  I personally cant just chalk things up to, since it wasn't mentioned in the bible then something never happened, was never meant to happen, etc . Over all, the assumption should be that Jesus as a heterosexual would have had the possibilty to have a relationship with a woman if he ever chose to at any point in his life. An there shouldn't be anything scandalous or negative about that being possible  EVEN with the fact that he had a mission he knew his mission and stuck with it.
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#20
(08-28-2018, 01:12 PM)originalscreenname Wrote: Thank you for the reply Angel,  I didnt consider that there may have been a reason for this idea of Mary Magdalene being a girlfriend of sorts.   I do agree that Jesus knew he had a mission and stuck with it,  but again, is there really anything wrong, immoral, blasphemous, etc with just the idea that Jesus could have had a girlfriend at some point in his life ? Practically speaking it may not have made sense for him too, ( i hate using the word but so many times ) BUT  I personally cant just chalk things up to, since it wasn't mentioned in the bible then something never happened, was never meant to happen, etc . Over all, the assumption should be that Jesus as a heterosexual would have had the possibilty to have a relationship with a woman if he ever chose to at any point in his life. An there shouldn't be anything scandalous or negative about that being possible  EVEN with the fact that he had a mission he knew his mission and stuck with it.
Peace.....well, you are having a personal type of thought and question, but to answer from me personally, I will say that I see Jesus as moving constantly among the people from town to town and then going to the desert very often to be alone and pray.  I think if there was any woman who He was drawn to or drawn to Him, He would have taken to the very highest level to save her soul.  It is apparent to me, that everytime Jesus spoke or acted, He had something to "teach & preach."  How could he even have time to take up a girlfriend when surrounded by so much opposition (barbaric opposition) and in a time where eyes were always on you - He was under constant scrutiny.  His heart was not divided at all - only concerned with the things of His Father and the mission He had.  Divine love is very complete and a love for all - which He had and expressed in His healings, preaching and forgiveness of sins.  If Jesus was here in person sitting in my living room, I wouldn't want to leave His side for a minute!  However, I must admit that I would want to share Him with others - so they would also have the beauty and peace of His presence.  This kind of holy presence would not give way to those thoughts I believe - from Him or another toward Him.  Any comments?  God bless, angeltime :heart:
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