Dating roles “reversed”
#11
To be honest I don’t think an older (older than me) mature gentleman would find me very mature, attractive, or very “feminine.” Academically inclined and scientifically intelligent maybe, but sorely lacking in most other areas of life.

I guess I’m still struggling with the fact that more than likely, I will never be married and it’s too late for me to start seeing having kids in the future. Everyone else around me either fornicates, cohabits with each other, or is already married with kids.

Then there’s me, all alone, and still living at home trying to maintain a house-trying to repair the fence, trying to cleanup the yard, fix the basement, do yard work, mow the lawn, etc. all very hard work for me. With the “man of the house” no longer in existence, I’m finding it very difficult to fit into those shoes. It’s a very lonely existence, I feel so alone. Church makes me even more lonely; all of these young married couples with lots of children (and that’s great for them!) but really no single, unmarried men my age in the current parish.

I just try to suck it up and deal with it, but that doesn’t change the loneliness and the fact that I can’t compare to other “faithful” women who are married and have kids. That seems to be the norm anyway among traditional(ist) Catholics.

Who wants a wife that: can’t really cook, doesn’t sew, doesn’t like to wear dresses or makeup, isn’t afraid to go outside and “get dirty,” does yard work and is mechanically inclined (oh the horror!), enjoys living with venomous animals of all kinds, wants to train a monitor lizard for search-and-rescue, enjoys praying the Book of Common Prayer, etc.? No one really.


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"The problem with you sir, is that your intelligence enables you to evaluate people critically and when you evaluate people critically, you bring danger upon yourself."   -Lao Tzu

"And God said, “Let the earth bring forth living creatures according to their kinds: [...] creeping things [...] of the earth according to their kinds.” And it was so." -Genesis 1:24 (RSV:CE)

"And what do we say to the god of death?" "...not today."


Vive les Catholiques de la Vendée!
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#12
(05-16-2019, 07:51 PM)Sequentia Wrote: To be honest I don’t think an older (older than me) mature gentleman would find me very mature, attractive, or very “feminine.” Academically inclined and scientifically intelligent maybe, but sorely lacking in most other areas of life.

I guess I’m still struggling with the fact that more than likely, I will never be married and it’s too late for me to start seeing having kids in the future. Everyone else around me either fornicates, cohabits with each other, or is already married with kids.

Then there’s me, all alone, and still living at home trying to maintain a house-trying to repair the fence, trying to cleanup the yard, fix the basement, do yard work, mow the lawn, etc. all very hard work for me. With the “man of the house” no longer in existence, I’m finding it very difficult to fit into those shoes. It’s a very lonely existence, I feel so alone. Church makes me even more lonely; all of these young married couples with lots of children (and that’s great for them!) but really no single, unmarried men my age in the current parish.

I just try to suck it up and deal with it, but that doesn’t change the loneliness and the fact that I can’t compare to other “faithful” women who are married and have kids. That seems to be the norm anyway among traditional(ist) Catholics.

Who wants a wife that: can’t really cook, doesn’t sew, doesn’t like to wear dresses or makeup, isn’t afraid to go outside and “get dirty,” does yard work and is mechanically inclined (oh the horror!), enjoys living with venomous animals of all kinds, wants to train a monitor lizard for search-and-rescue, enjoys praying the Book of Common Prayer, etc.? No one really.


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Sounds like you need somebody like Marlin Perkins Smile
https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/snake-bit/
But seriously, I wish you luck, Sequentia.


Oh, where are the snows of yesteryear!
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#13


Oh, where are the snows of yesteryear!
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#14
What is stopping you from learning to cook and sew? These are not traditionally feminine expertises. All men and women should learn these tasks. Even so, the majority of trad women I know don't know how to see though they'd like to learn. And most married men I know would love for their wife to help with the yard work. The kids should help too when old enough; they usually have natural curiosity and desire to assist anyway.

Men might think you're not interested in dating and marriage. If you don't put any effort into your appearance, you're figuratively signing that you're not interested in male attention. You don't need to go contouring crazy and look like a drag queen the way women do their makeup these days. Nor do you need to wear a dress all the time. But not putting certain attention to your comportment, including your behavior and acts of service toward others, risks making your intentions invisible.

You wouldn't go to a job interview in sweats with a dirty, wrinkled resume. An arachnid lures her mate in certain ways, so too does a woman. (Just don't kill him afterward).

I'm not saying be all stereotypical and not yourself. Think of it like your job.and your spiritual life. You might act in ways that are outside your comfort zone but ultimately they are for your betterment.
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