Ok ladies, what are your "honest" thoughts here..
#1
I am currently in the midst of discerning my vocation and I would like some input here from yall concerning the vocation of marriage.  It may come as no surprise that I, being Catholic, love the idea of being married with children.  I must say, I do have struggles in life and I would like to know at what point would I be deemed worthy of marrying a Godly woman?  I have looked at lots of blogs, articles, forums, etc., and some of the commentary seems fairly intimidating.  According to the majority of what I've read, single men should have good jobs, unattached from parents, and basically be an upstanding citizen.  On the flip side, I do know lots of devout married men who state otherwise.  Since I adhere to the traditional teachings of the Church, I always thought a single man should be free from worldly attachments (materialism, addictions, etc) and frequenting the Sacraments as a basic prep for all vocations.
 
So what do you expect from a single man if you're single woman?  Or if you're married, please feel free to share your husband's state in life before marriage if you wish.

Thanks ladies and God Bless yall.
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#2
(09-04-2019, 01:37 PM)capmchuck Wrote: I am currently in the midst of discerning my vocation and I would like some input here from yall concerning the vocation of marriage.  It may come as no surprise that I, being Catholic, love the idea of being married with children.  I must say, I do have struggles in life and I would like to know at what point would I be deemed worthy of marrying a Godly woman?  I have looked at lots of blogs, articles, forums, etc., and some of the commentary seems fairly intimidating.  According to the majority of what I've read, single men should have good jobs, unattached from parents, and basically be an upstanding citizen.  On the flip side, I do know lots of devout married men who state otherwise.  Since I adhere to the traditional teachings of the Church, I always thought a single man should be free from worldly attachments (materialism, addictions, etc) and frequenting the Sacraments as a basic prep for all vocations.
 
So what do you expect from a single man if you're single woman?  Or if you're married, please feel free to share your husband's state in life before marriage if you wish.

Thanks ladies and God Bless yall.

Greetings capmchuck, I'm sure there's a girl for you out there somewhere. Just hold out for a very virtuous one, that's key!

I was just curious what you meant when you wrote that, "On the flip side, I do know lots of devout married men who state otherwise."
"Not only are we all in the same boat, but we are all seasick.” --G.K. Chesterton
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#3
Thank you for your response. I probably should have clarified that a little better. The "devout" men that I know, many of which are non-Catholic, were anything but the type of man that would attract a virtuous woman. I cannot vouch for this because I did not know them in their younger years, just by testimony. However, they had the desire to become the man God intended and give the credit to their wives. I'm sure you have heard many men say "If it wasn't for my wife...".

I guess the bar may have moved over the years as many women do have material requirements. I just don't see a direct correlation between success and status and Godliness. If I recall, the current President of McAllister Tug and Transportation Co. was raised in a devout Irish Catholic family and said a single man should never have or make too much money.

I know it may appear that I am just trying hedge against a degree of insecurity but I guess all I can do is stay in the Sacraments and grow in the devout life..
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#4
(09-07-2019, 11:54 AM)capmchuck Wrote: I guess the bar may have moved over the years as many women do have material requirements. 

A homemaker who doesn't work for pay so she can stay home and raise children *has* to worry about a man's ability to meet material requirements. If he can't pay the mortgage/rent, utility bills, and for groceries and other needs, she and their children will be starving in the streets. A woman who doesn't consider a man's ability to provide is lacking common sense.

But there are common sense practical concerns on the one hand, and gold-digging on the other -- i.e., what's considered a material *requirement* is important. A woman who thinks she "requires" (or who wouldn't be content without, who wouldn't refrain from nagging and making you miserable unless she gets) a new car every other year, foreign travel, the biggest house on the block, and a $1000/month clothes budget is not good wife material for the guy who's making $40K. So talking to each other about expected lifestyle is something to do before even thinking about walking down the aisle.

Anyway, if you want a good woman, be a good man. Focus on growing in virtue above all. Master yourself. Engage in service. Have hobbies and interests. No porn whatsoever. And learn some game, have a realistic view of typical female nature.
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