What am I supposed to do if I work weekends?
#1
I work on average 2 weekends a month (Fri-Sun nights).  Sometimes more, sometimes less.  Within the next couple of years, due to various issues like child care, finishing school, and completing clinicals while working full time, it is possible that there may be stretches of time where I work every weekend for several months in a row.  This also includes all major holidays like Christmas, Christmas Eve, and Easter.  My parish offers Masses Fri through Mon; with enough finagling it is likely that even at the worst of times I could attend a Fri evening Mass (Monday mornings would be a no-go unfortunately because if you've ever tried driving 1.5 hours each way after working overnight for 12 hours, what happens is that you crash your car and die; I've tried to push myself in this way in the past with forcing myself to stay up and it just does not work on a physical level).  A couple of questions:

1) When does this become sinful as regards not attending Mass?  
2) What can I do to remedy this aside from not going to work and getting fired?
3) Let's say I could do something like go part time for a stretch as I'm finishing clinicals and taking my boards: Is it selfish to do this just so that I can go to Mass even if it means less money for my family temporarily?  Is wanting to give myself a break for the opportunity to attend Mass a self-indulgence or the right thing to do?


Huh
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#2
Work may be a legitimate reason to miss Mass, but you should try to fix that situation as soon as possible. Legitimate reason or not, missing Mass for a long period of time can’t possibly be good for your spiritual life.
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#3
Depending on your relationship, I'd advice talking with your boss ASAP. He may not be able to give you every Sunday off, but maybe he can work a three hour break into your schedule on Holy Days of Obligation, so you can go to Mass. I'm praying for you.
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#4
(11-05-2019, 05:33 AM)Credidi Propter Wrote: Work may be a legitimate reason to miss Mass, but you should try to fix that situation as soon as possible. Legitimate reason or not, missing Mass for a long period of time can’t possibly be good for your spiritual life.

Well that's sort of the pickle.  I'm attempting to do a lot at once over the next couple years, but once I take my boards I will never have to miss another Mass, or Holy Day, or really any day ever again for the rest of my life.  The problem is the short term sacrifice; I'm basically front loading the missing of Mass rather than drag out this "two weekends a month + holidays" thing. 

But if I'm going to Low Mass on Fridays, I'm still making it a habitual thing, right?  I mean I'm not sure if that's good enough, but my options aren't limitless either.


(11-05-2019, 05:38 AM)ThatGladTrad Wrote: Depending on your relationship, I'd advice talking with your boss ASAP. He may not be able to give you every Sunday off, but maybe he can work a three hour break into your schedule on Holy Days of Obligation, so you can go to Mass. I'm praying for you.

Because I'm an RN, it doesn't really work like that, unfortunately.  The expectation is that you WILL work weekends and holidays and that is non-negotiable.  I can't take an office job over shift work either because of specific inpatient experience requirements for my future degree/licensure and the necessity of having multiple weekdays open for clinicals.  And then when my kid comes and my wife goes back to work, working weekends will be my only option because I will need to be home during the week so that... you know, the baby can not die and stuff.  And yes, my wife could just not work, but that requires me making big money first, which is fine and all, but that comes back to me taking my boards as quickly as possible, which brings us full circle to... me working lots of weekends in the meantime  Undecided
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#5
First off, congratulations on the expected little one!  I had no idea.  Or maybe you mentioned it and I forgot cuz my ADHD kicked in and LOOKS SOMETHING SHINY!!

I'd start by speaking to your pastor, laying out the issue for him in more detail than the webs can allow, and get his take and opinion.  Then, based on what your pastor says, speak very delicately with your boss re: federal law requires employers to make reasonable accommodations for religious exercise, unless that accommodation would cause undue hardship on the employer.  I say delicately because while the law protects you, it also has the potential to be viewed as trying to buck the system.  Perhaps you could come in an hour late and stay an hour late, or switch a small portion of your shift when someone else; they would cover your shift a little on Sunday AM, and you would cover theirs on Saturday AM.
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#6
How far to the nearest Mass?  Even an NO?
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I see your long term plan and I think it is a good one, but I see the fix you are in, as well.  Yes, talk to your priest with this information and plan, ask for a few minutes, not just as he is walking out after Mass, to explain the situation.  There must be some solution.
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#7
(11-05-2019, 06:42 AM)Imperator Caesar Trump Wrote: I'm attempting to do a lot at once over the next couple years, but once I take my boards I will never have to miss another Mass, or Holy Day, or really any day ever again for the rest of my life.  The problem is the short term sacrifice; I'm basically front loading the missing of Mass rather than drag out this "two weekends a month + holidays" thing. 

But if I'm going to Low Mass on Fridays, I'm still making it a habitual thing, right?  I mean I'm not sure if that's good enough, but my options aren't limitless either.

Talk with your priest and work out something that works.

You still always have to do something to sanctify Sundays and Holy Days (Third Commandment). If you are legitimately impeded from Mass and must work, you have no obligation to Mass or omitting servile work.

Classically medical workers are easily exempted.

You certainly would be under these circumstances, and especially if it is a big push to avoid long term missing of Mass and especially missing Mass when you have a family you need to be an example for as the children grow. My opinion only here, but I think it is better that you miss some Sunday Masses while your kiddo is in utero and a few years old, rather than be doing this when he or she is 5 and dad's presence or absence will be remembered and could leave lasting effects.

Most priests will probably say, miss Mass if you must, but try to take advantage of weekday Masses when you can to keep up your spiritual life, but to get advice tailored to your situation, ask your priest to help formulate a specific plan.
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#8
(11-05-2019, 11:04 PM)MagisterMusicae Wrote: My opinion only here, but I think it is better that you miss some Sunday Masses while your kiddo is in utero and a few years old, rather than be doing this when he or she is 5 and dad's presence or absence will be remembered and could leave lasting effects.

Yeah this articulates what I wasn't able to.  I've read all about how important the father's presence specifically is at Mass.
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