"Work wife/ husband"
#1
Heard this term today for the first time in a while. It is the most degenerate garbage I can imagine. People who use terms like this, even ironically, should be ashamed.
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#2
Oh I know, that's awful! If my husband ever talked that way I'd ask him to get a new job. How degrading for one's spouse.
"Not only are we all in the same boat, but we are all seasick.” --G.K. Chesterton
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#3
I am familiar with this term.  I certainly understand how this term might anger or offend someone, but it is not meant that way.
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My experience with it that it means that this is your opposite sex friend at work.  The friend of the opposite sex who you enjoy working with, who you click with.  It is platonic and not sexual in nature.   You sometimes eat lunch together, usually in the break room or out with other people.   And, when you work 40- 60 hours a week, you have trouble getting things done during the day.  You wife or husband cannot help you because he/she is at work far away, so your "work wife/husband", meaning your good friend at work, can help you out.  It is nice to have one person at work who wants you both to succeed (sometimes that is not how it works with women).
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Yes, your spouse is your primary person, but at work we all like to have friends.  It is actually a public understanding that you are strictly platonic so it helps squash gossip in the office.
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The work wife/husband should never, ever be a secret from your real spouse, and you have to both be very careful to never cross any lines.  It is a friendship.  You do not bare your soul to your work-wife.  You do not share family secrets or talk negatively about your real spouse - that ruins the whole thing.  It is strictly work based.  No socializing outside of work.  No after hours phone calls.  It only works if you are both happily married.  Or the guy is gay.  Gay works out really well.  Gay married is even better.
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#4
I work in a mixed gender environment (only 2 genders there, not 600+) so I've heard it used once or twice by a lady down the hall referring to a male co-worker. Personally, I don't like the term, as I can see how it may get misconstrued by spectators to mean something other than a tight working relationship.

Oddly, the women I have a really good working relationship and friendship with have never called me "work husband", nor would they want to be called "work wife." The only one who's ever tried to call me that was the crazy lady who got sacked for making the men uncomfortable.

(11-15-2019, 03:39 AM)MaryTN Wrote: The work wife/husband should never, ever be a secret from your real spouse, and you have to both be very careful to never cross any lines. .

This is probably wrong, but it reminds me of the old British naval toast: "To wives and girlfriends: may they never meet!" :laughing:
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#5
(11-15-2019, 03:39 AM)MaryTN Wrote: I am familiar with this term.  I certainly understand how this term might anger or offend someone, but it is not meant that way.
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My experience with it that it means that this is your opposite sex friend at work.  The friend of the opposite sex who you enjoy working with, who you click with.  It is platonic and not sexual in nature.   You sometimes eat lunch together, usually in the break room or out with other people.   And, when you work 40- 60 hours a week, you have trouble getting things done during the day.  You wife or husband cannot help you because he/she is at work far away, so your "work wife/husband", meaning your good friend at work, can help you out.  It is nice to have one person at work who wants you both to succeed (sometimes that is not how it works with women).
.
Yes, your spouse is your primary person, but at work we all like to have friends.  It is actually a public understanding that you are strictly platonic so it helps squash gossip in the office.
.
The work wife/husband should never, ever be a secret from your real spouse, and you have to both be very careful to never cross any lines.  It is a friendship.  You do not bare your soul to your work-wife.  You do not share family secrets or talk negatively about your real spouse - that ruins the whole thing.  It is strictly work based.  No socializing outside of work.  No after hours phone calls.  It only works if you are both happily married.  Or the guy is gay.  Gay works out really well.  Gay married is even better.
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It's fine to have a friend at work who's of the opposite gender, but labeling them "work-husband" or "work-wife" is far too intimate. I think it crosses the line. The other modern phrase I can't stand is using the word "Family" to describe a business or school. I find it highly offensive. Vulgar even.
"Not only are we all in the same boat, but we are all seasick.” --G.K. Chesterton
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#6
(11-15-2019, 08:08 PM)JacafamalaRedux Wrote:
(11-15-2019, 03:39 AM)MaryTN Wrote: I am familiar with this term.  I certainly understand how this term might anger or offend someone, but it is not meant that way.
.
My experience with it that it means that this is your opposite sex friend at work.  The friend of the opposite sex who you enjoy working with, who you click with.  It is platonic and not sexual in nature.   You sometimes eat lunch together, usually in the break room or out with other people.   And, when you work 40- 60 hours a week, you have trouble getting things done during the day.  You wife or husband cannot help you because he/she is at work far away, so your "work wife/husband", meaning your good friend at work, can help you out.  It is nice to have one person at work who wants you both to succeed (sometimes that is not how it works with women).
.
Yes, your spouse is your primary person, but at work we all like to have friends.  It is actually a public understanding that you are strictly platonic so it helps squash gossip in the office.
.
The work wife/husband should never, ever be a secret from your real spouse, and you have to both be very careful to never cross any lines.  It is a friendship.  You do not bare your soul to your work-wife.  You do not share family secrets or talk negatively about your real spouse - that ruins the whole thing.  It is strictly work based.  No socializing outside of work.  No after hours phone calls.  It only works if you are both happily married.  Or the guy is gay.  Gay works out really well.  Gay married is even better.
.

It's fine to have a friend at work who's of the opposite gender, but labeling them "work-husband" or "work-wife" is far too intimate. I think it crosses the line. The other modern phrase I can't stand is using the word "Family" to describe a business or school. I find it highly offensive. Vulgar even.

You have good points.
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#7
(11-15-2019, 09:18 PM)MaryTN Wrote:
(11-15-2019, 08:08 PM)JacafamalaRedux Wrote: It's fine to have a friend at work who's of the opposite gender, but labeling them "work-husband" or "work-wife" is far too intimate. I think it crosses the line. The other modern phrase I can't stand is using the word "Family" to describe a business or school. I find it highly offensive. Vulgar even.

You have good points.

Along the same lines, I love anthropomorphic humor and use it often, but I'm getting uneasy about calling our pets our "babies" or "siblings".

I think that Amazon Synod poster with the woman breastfeeding some kind of weasel pushed me over the edge.  :puke:
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#8
(11-15-2019, 03:39 AM)MaryTN Wrote: I am familiar with this term.  I certainly understand how this term might anger or offend someone, but it is not meant that way.
.
My experience with it that it means that this is your opposite sex friend at work.  The friend of the opposite sex who you enjoy working with, who you click with.  It is platonic and not sexual in nature.   You sometimes eat lunch together, usually in the break room or out with other people.   And, when you work 40- 60 hours a week, you have trouble getting things done during the day.  You wife or husband cannot help you because he/she is at work far away, so your "work wife/husband", meaning your good friend at work, can help you out.  It is nice to have one person at work who wants you both to succeed (sometimes that is not how it works with women).
.
Yes, your spouse is your primary person, but at work we all like to have friends.  It is actually a public understanding that you are strictly platonic so it helps squash gossip in the office.
.
The work wife/husband should never, ever be a secret from your real spouse, and you have to both be very careful to never cross any lines.  It is a friendship.  You do not bare your soul to your work-wife.  You do not share family secrets or talk negatively about your real spouse - that ruins the whole thing.  It is strictly work based.  No socializing outside of work.  No after hours phone calls.  It only works if you are both happily married.  Or the guy is gay.  Gay works out really well.  Gay married is even better.
.

I honestly tend to avoid relationships with women that become too involved. I don't think this should necessarily be a blanket rule for all people all the time though. Individuals and couples need to figure out where those lines are. I think erring on the safe side is always good, however.

The problem for me is that I am simply too attractive and the women typically make it inappropriate or want something more. I've taken a very cautious/reticent approach to it for the past several years and it has worked well for me. It's too easy to enjoy the attention and let it appeal to my vanity.

It actually is true that my looks were a serious impediment to living a remotely Christian life for most of my 20s. So I tend to see the work wife stuff as implicitly flirty, but that might not always be the case.
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#9
I would like my wife not to work, but we live in a difficult time when it is difficult to pay for loans by yourself. But maybe in the future, I will come up with something and my wife will spend more time with our family and children. This is her dream that I want to fulfill. Actually, we have a very difficult relationship, because she read my messages on the phone. But I will not hide the fact that I am guilty before her. And I'm thinking about how to fix it to keep my marriage. Thus, I found an article with advice on fix cheating, do you think these are good tips and should I follow them?
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#10
I've had a "work wife". If you find it offensive then you must not understand what the term means. There is nothing sexual, demeaning to others or  sinful about it.
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