Spacing pregnancies
#11
(11-20-2019, 07:04 PM)Margaret-Mary Wrote: As a lactation counselor and a mother with many years of breastfeeding experience, I can confidently advise that you cannot rely on exclusive breastfeeding to suppress ovulation. It CAN be the case, and it can also NOT be the case.

ETA: If your wife has any difficulty with breastfeeding, seek help from a good lactation expert right away; i.e. don’t let her wait out any problems because she may feel she “should” be able to “just do it.” Most problems can be easily corrected with the guidance of a knowledgeable LC.

I really respect your line of work!  The joke on L&D units is to call you guys the Milk Nazis, but, as you said, it can be really easy for a new mother to become frustrated with breastfeeding and dissuaded.  I will definitely request an LC when my wife delivers if they don't automatically do a consultation.
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#12
(11-20-2019, 07:17 PM)Margaret-Mary Wrote:
(11-20-2019, 04:22 PM)Sacred Heart lover Wrote: One thing to know:  The breastfeeding spacing only works if you're not sleeping through the night and you feed many times throughout the day.

It doesn’t necessarily work even if you feed on demand 24/7, co-sleep, produce masses of milk...

True...I don't know the stats but I do know that it's more effective if you keep the feedings at less than four-hour intervals from a doctor I met with.
Rome will lose the faith and become the seat of the antichrist. 
The demons of the air together with the Antichrist will perform great wonders  
The Church will be in eclipse

-Our Lady of La Salette


Like Christ, His Bride the Church will undergo its own passion, burial, and resurrection.
-unknown traditional priest

Father Ripperger said that if we are detached from all things, aren't afraid to suffer, and we accept all suffering as the will of God for our sanctity, we have nothing to fear!
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#13
(11-20-2019, 11:50 AM)GangGreen Wrote: I know people who had two kids in less than 2 years and it wasn't easy. As a man it's easy to say just pop them out! However, pregnancy is taxing on a woman.  Also, the first 6 months or so with a newborn/infant are tough and they aren't very self-sufficient until even after that. Add in the constant adjustments as they grow, crawl, walk, talk, etc. The first year is just crazy. Then if your wife is completely out of commission by pregnancy issues, it'll be even harder to take care of the baby. I know many trads are concerned with popping out tons of children (which honestly I hate the whole 7 kids or bust mentality, everyone has their own situations to deal with), but there's also an even more important aspect of giving your children the proper amount of care/attention. We're going to try to wait at least until our little one is over a year old before trying again (unless it happens by accident  Sticking tongue out at you ). I don't think anyone really recommended an amount of time for us to wait, but I'd say 12 to 18 months makes sense.

Also, I will say that NFP is not as easy postpartum. The cycle is all over the place, so depending on how often you do it, the chances of pregnancy are probably much higher. My wife was recently convinced that she was pregnant when she ovulated early. She was terrified, I was like "No problem! Whatever the Lord wills!" Didn't happen, but anyway...

If you're just looking to space them out a bit and it's no big deal (i.e. grave), mucus only is pretty reliable. Worked for us while breastfeeding. Wife gets fertile mucus, abstain for 5 full days. 

Spacing them out a bit is not only good for mom's body, it can also mean she's good to go for the next pregnancy. My mom had 5 babies and two miscarriages in 7 years. By the last child the doctor was telling her that if she had anymore it might do her in. Yeah, but that was back in the bottle feeding years: 1958-1965.
"Not only are we all in the same boat, but we are all seasick.” --G.K. Chesterton
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#14
(11-20-2019, 01:58 AM)Imperator Caesar Trump Wrote: So I got married in May and our first child is due in February.  Clearly I'm not Joe NFP, and I'm not casually throwing out the question of timing pregnancies because I'm in that mindset; I'm just ruminating here.  I've been looking toward the future and Child #2 and it's been provoking some questions.  The main one concerns the spacing of pregnancies.  General recommendations from physicians are to wait 18 months after a child's birth before conceiving again.  This is based on various health risks to the mother and child.  

My personal feeling is that 18 months is beyond excessive.  I am having trouble finding hard numbers on the level of risk associated with waiting 18 months vs 12 months vs 6 months.  What I can find makes the risks seem fairly negligible.  This is important to me for two reasons: 1) I don't want to use NFP to space pregnancies if there is no "grave" or even "kinda grave" reason to do so, and 2) my wife and I got into tradition on the late side.  She will just be turning 34 when she gives birth to our first child.  We frankly don't have the kind of time I want to have in order to have the size of family we want.  Spacing pregnancies too far apart makes a big, big difference given the windows we are looking at.

So I guess, does anyone have any information on these risks for close spacing or personal experiences?  Advice?  I completely understand that I am overthinking this in a way that is not in line with a traditional mindset and even in a way that is possibly contraceptive in nature.  Sorry but I don't want to get my wife pregnant again too soon and send some poor baby to limbo if it can be avoided.  And to be clear, I'll be comfortable with whatever size family God gives us; I simply prefer to lean toward the bigger side if possible.

All new couples should know how to identify embryonic/fetal remains as a byproduct of a miscarriage and conduct a conditional baptism.  According to ancient manuals, a person is not considered certainly dead until putrefaction is observed in the body, so you should have no concern in conducting a conditional baptism whatsoever right after miscarriage.  So if the real concern is some increased likelihood of miscarriage and subsequent loss of eternal beatitude for your child, then this should alleviate it. 

My thought is that if you're not strapped for funds, and not planning to be unwelcoming to future children who may be conceived anyway, then why worry about it?  The primary purpose of marriage is to beget and educate children...so...just do it?  (I think St. Paul is even pretty clear on this front when he admonishes spouses not to be apart from one another, etc.)

Also, if your wife is healthy and consumes a robust diet with plenty of clean water, then there really shouldn't be that great of a concern about her body's ability to deal with the stresses of pregnancy.  It is what her body is naturally made to do, and while she is aged for a first child, a lot of how her body will deal with subsequent pregnancies will be indicated in the delivery and nursing of the first.  If her body is able to produce sufficient milk for your firstborn, then I would be extremely skeptical with anyone who proposes that she may be in danger by the natural process of a second close pregnancy. 

An anecdote for you: my great-grandmother was 16 when she was first married.  Her firstborn, my grandfather, came when she was 17.  The physician who assisted at my grandfather's birth warned my great-grandmother not to have any more children; he said that it would kill her.  So she and her husband were said to be "careful" until she was about 33 years old.  I think they figured that she was likely no longer able to conceive.  However, that is when my grandfather's brother was conceived.  He was born with no mention of an issue.  Then, when she was 37 she conceived again and gave birth to another boy with no mention of difficulty.  She was delivered of her final pregnancy at the age of 40, another boy, with no mention of complication or difficulty.  This was a final for her because her husband died suddenly that same year. ...and while there COULD have been miscarriages in between, there was no reason to despair as conditional baptism is remedy for any fear or anxiety in that regard.

Ultimately, the welcoming of children is the sign of the spouses' generosity...so give generously.
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#15
I am 35 next month.  I have a 7, almost 6, 2, and 6 month old.  I am seeing an NFP OB/GYN.  That doctor said space 6 months minimum.  I have awesome postpartum recoveries.  

I have ovulated 4 weeks postpartum.  Breastfeeding does not do a thing to prevent cycles from restarting.  We use Marquette successfully to space due to continuous mucous and other things health wise that we need to monitor.

I have 2 sons 14 months apart.  Was it fun?  Not really.  Was it worth not having to ever go to play dates?  Yes.   They are best friends.  

A lot depends on how things go postpartum.  If you can, pelvic floor physical therapy is AMAZING and helps fix a lot of wear and tear (make sure your PT is female).

On a side note, due to age, is she getting progesterone monitoring?
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#16
(12-01-2019, 12:55 AM)crisisonion Wrote: On a side note, due to age, is she getting progesterone monitoring?

What's this for?
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#17
(12-03-2019, 05:25 AM)Imperator Caesar Trump Wrote:
(12-01-2019, 12:55 AM)crisisonion Wrote: On a side note, due to age, is she getting progesterone monitoring?

What's this for?

Progesterone levels are an early indicator of impending pregnancy loss if they are low or decreased during pregnancy.
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