What was your religious background?
#2
I've had a couple of years to sort my path out, and this is the most coherent narrative I can muster:

I was raised moderately generic Christian until my mom dragged my sister and I to a Methodist church for a couple of years when we were kids. We were never baptized, my mom believing this was our own choice (and, as I would later come to realize, was a blessing in itself). I didn't hate it, Sunday School was fun. After that, we moved away and with that reduced our church-going to once a year (if that) at Christmas time.

I soon fell into satanism and atheism in my teenage years, mostly influenced by the music I listened to. I soon morphed away from the satanism into a "new atheist." So I was an obnoxious snob with no real philosophical grounds for my opposition to Christianity and the wide spectrum of religions. I knew next to nothing about Catholicism outside of my mother dubbing it the "church of guilt" and my father being a lapsed Catholic who never once spoke about it. So my bias was firmly rooted in Protestant stereotypes.

Once I was in college (2010-2014) I fluctuated between a sort of vain Luciferianism and atheism, and by the end of my 4 years I simply had to interest in religion whatsoever. I didn't mock it or anything, it just was not a focus of mine.

Fast-forward to 2016, when we had my daughter, our firstborn, and that was when I really began questioning my atheism. I couldn't accept that this child was the result of a series of indifferent random accidents. So I found an interest in perennialism and traditionalism, namely along the lines of Huxley, Evola and Guenon. I identified an underlying commonality across all religions, which I came to know as the "divinity." I wanted to practice some sort of faith, so I first sought out Asatru, but after a few months really couldn't push myself to honestly believe in Thor or Odin as more than archetypes. Due to my interest in Evola, the whole concept of the "man against time" drove me towards Ancient Rome. So at first I attached myself to their gods, Jove and Apollo in particular, and that was where the aforementioned commonalities really came to light. I also became more and more interested in the Catholic Church while reading Gibbon's anti-Catholic Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire. The position the Church had in the Empire as well as how the wider communion of saints seemed to perfect the sporadic pantheon of lesser deities in the Roman religion struck a cord with me. I strangely found myself fixated on a particular statue of St. Longinus, which I thought was badass, as well as St. Michael. I wanted to practice some sort of santeria and worship them as gods, but was soon directed to Our Lady and really became fixated on her too.

By October 2017, right at the 100-year anniversary of Fatima, I was off work on a stay-cation with my daughter and I came across the reasoning JRR Tolkien used to convert CS Lewis, namely, his argument for Christianity as the only true "myth." For whatever reason, this put the pieces together for me and I understood just what those commonalities between religions were, and how they culminated in the Roman Catholic Church. I soon sought out RCIA and was brought into the Church Easter 2018. Since then I have found a reasonably close SSPX chapel and exclusively attend Latin Mass.
"The Heart of Jesus is closer to you when you suffer, than when you are full of joy." - St. Margaret Mary Alacoque

Put not your trust in princes: In the children of men, in whom there is no salvation. - Ps. 145:2-3

"For there shall be a time, when they will not endure sound doctrine; but, according to their own desires, they will heap to themselves teachers, having itching ears: And will indeed turn away their hearing from the truth, but will be turned unto fables." - 2 Timothy 4:3-4
[-] The following 6 users Like Augustinian's post:
  • Catherine, formerbuddhist, HailGilbert, jack89, josh987654321, SeekerofChrist
Reply


Messages In This Thread
RE: What was your religious background? - by Augustinian - 02-06-2020, 07:24 PM



Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)