Taking Holy Communion after Accidental Profanity
#9
This is published by the Redemptorists, "The 10 Commandments for the Scrupulous".  Have a read.

https://scrupulousanonymous.org/wp-conte...s_2013.pdf

A lot of the issue with Scruples is not understanding who God actually is, based upon who we think he is, (or have often been instructed by Poor Educators or Well-Meaning Parents to believe he is).  God very much loves a flawed soul possessed of a Good Will, and tailors his healing and forgiveness weighing up our failings and .  So part of your journey is going to be to learn to trust God, despite how many times you appear to fail Him.  You get up again.  You go to Confession.  If you don't give up on Him, he is always there, ready to forgive, like the Father in the story of the Prodigal Son.  Whilst God's Justice exists, it's far outweighed by God's Mercy, and the Mystic Saints understand this, deeply.

Blessed Julian of Norwich compared the soul to a Servant set out on a difficult task by a Good King.  On the way, the Servant trips and falls into a pit.  The King, loving his Servant had followed him the entire time, expecting him to fall due to the difficult nature of the task.  The King has pity on his Servant, because he understood the Good Will he has for his King, so he reaches down and offer his hand to pull his Servant out of the pit...

... but the Servant doesn't take his hand.  He doesn't even see his hand and has forgotten all about the King.  Why?  He's too busy wrapped up in his own misery, trapped by his own pain, lying in the pit, feeling very sorry for himself.

The Sacrament of Confession is the King's Hand, always ready to pull you out of the pit when you truly fall.  This is how much God loves you.  But Scruples is like digging a pit based upon your own misunderstandings and expectations of holiness and throwing yourself into it.

Here's some of the Mystic's understanding of God.  I'd suggest you read them slowly-and-prayerfully whenever you feel tempted to worry.

Here's Lord Jesus, talking to Servant of God, Sister Benigna Cosolata Ferrero:

 [Image: lmljp3.jpg]

Saint Therese of Lisieux, writing to Fr Maurice Belliere, who was afflicted with a mistrust in God's mercy due to his sins:

[i]“You love St. Augustine, St. Magdalene; these souls to whom “many sins were forgiven because they loved much”. Me too, I love them; I love their repentance, and especially… their loving audacity! When I see Magdalene come forward in the midst of the numerous guests, showering the feet of her adorable Master with her tears, that she’s touching for the first time, I sense that her heart has understood the abysses of love and mercy of the Heart of Jesus and that, total sinner that she is, this Heart of love is not only disposed to pardon her but still more to lavish upon her the benefits of his divine intimacy, to lift her up to the highest summits of contemplation. Ah! my dear little Brother, since it was given to me also to understand the love of the Heart of Jesus, I admit to you that has chased away all fear from my heart. The memory of my faults humiliates me, it brings me to never lean on my strength, which is only a weakness, but even more this memory speaks to me of mercy and love. How—when you throw your faults with total, filial trust in the burning all-consuming brazier of love—how wouldn’t they be consumed without coming back?”[/i]

Notice what she says about 'audacity'.  You can love God with Confidence that you are loved, despite your many faults and failings, and this is what speeds you towards God.

Here's Saint Bernard of Clairvaux, speaking about the 'Canticle of Canticles', with the Bride (the metaphor for our soul) preparing to meet the bridegroom (the prefiguring metaphor for Jesus):

"What?  When thou art fit only to hide thyself, dost thous seek the light, and though more deserving of correction than favour, dare to run unto the Bridegroom?  Wonderful it will be if you do not find a Judge to condemn you instead of a husband to receive you.  Happy is he who shall hear his soul replying to these reproaches:  'I do not fear because I love, and also I am loved; nor could i have loved unless He first loved me.  Let those fear who have no love; but for the soul that loves there is nothing to be feared.  How can those who have no love do otherwise than be under constant apprehension of injury?  But because I love, I no more doubt that I am loved than I doubt of my own love; nor can I possibly fear his countenance, whose affection for me I have assuredly felt... Not only has He sought me, as unhappy as I am, but has caused me to seek Him...  He sought me when I contemned [rejected or ignored] Him, why should he contemn when I see him?"

I would suggest you pray this prayer by Saint Claude de la Colombiere each day, the final paragraph of which predates St Therese by 200 years, but could be right out of her writing.

An Act of Confidence in the Goodness of our Lord

Lord, behold a soul that is in this world to exercise Thy admirable mercy and to make it shine before Heaven and Earth. Others glorify Thee by manifesting the strength of Thy grace by their fidelity and constancy. As for me, Lord, I will glorify Thee by making known Thy infinite Goodness toward sinners, proclaiming that nothing can exhaust it and that there is no relapse, no matter how vile and ignominious, that should make a sinner despair of pardon.

If I have greviously offended Thee, my adorable Redeemer; it would be even worse were I to hurl at Thee the horrendous insult of considering the goodness of Thy Heart insufficient to pardon me!

It is in vain that Thy and my enemy prepares new nooses of despair. He will cause me to lose everything before I lose the hope I have in Thy mercy.

Even if I were to fall a hundred times, and even if my crimes were to be a hundred times more horrendous, I would still hope in Thee!
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RE: Taking Holy Communion after Accidental Profanity - by Macksbeard - 03-31-2021, 07:30 PM



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